Standing at the Top of a Hill
by BloodyTearsOfLife
Summary: Erin is getting abused by her father and after her graduation she leaves to LA, where she meets a new group of people who show her life can be fun. Ties in with July Jones, I suggest reading that first.
1. AN and Prologue

Okay, I'm starting a new story! I was feeling inspired. So, you are going to be reading this at first and be saying "what the heck does this have to do with the Fast and the Furious?" I'm doing the background stuff first just like JJ, so please be patient! This story is about a girl named Erin who is getting abused by her father and finally runs away to, yes you gessed it, LA. I haven't worked out all the details yet so I can't tell you them! lol! **Just want to warn you that this story will be dealing with physical abuse and will have scene or two later on. I wasn't too sure what the rating should be so if you think PG-13 is too low for this let me know and I will raise it.** I also have to say that sadly, I don't any of the character from TFATF. I'll let you know when that changes. ;) lol! Anyone you don't recognize is mine. Anyways, I hope you guys like it and don't forget to review!

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Standing at the top of a hill looking down everything always seems so surreal. The lights that twinkle in the far distance, the buildings that are silhouetted against the dark blue sky but it's the stars that make everything even more unreal. Staring at something that isn't even really there. Standing at the top of a hill looking down makes everything seem insignificant. When you can see so much you realize how small you are and how meaningless you are. How your life will never really affect a great number of people. It shows you how small the town you live in is. You see how much more there is out there, imagine how many things there are out there to experience, how many people you will never meet, how many place you will never see. Standing at the top of a hill looking down you come to realize just who you are, what you are made of, how fragile you are, how strong you are. Standing at the top of a hill looking down your thought wonder and you come to find the real meaning of things. You come to find out exactly what you want and how you are going to get it. Standing at the top of a hill looking down means a lot of things to a lot of different people, but for me, standing at the top of a hill looking down is exactly where my whole life changed.


	2. School

Taking a deep breath I prepared my self. Prepared myself to face another day of school, another day of pretending. _Hey at this rate I could become a great actress, maybe I should consider that for I career_. I checked myself in my rear view mirror. Two dark chocolate eyes stared back at me, along with two perfectly arched eyebrows, a simple nose, and well shaped lips. I ran a hand through my shoulder length reddish-brown hair and decided this was as good as it was going to get. Getting out of the car, I grabbed my backpack from the backseat and locked the car. Adjusting the bag on my shoulder, I confidently walked towards the school, my sneakers making no noise on the asphalt. I paused before the door to the student center, I smoothed out white v-neck blouse, noticing how dark the blouse made me, and then doubled checked to see if my wallet was in the back pocket of my jean shorts. I told myself to look at the upside; it was Friday, just today and then two days of peace; plus only one week left of school after this and I was done. Graduation was next weekend. Taking another deep breath I plastered a fake smile on my face and opened the door and instantly my ears were filled with the noise chatter of everyone making small talk. It wasn't half as loud as it would be at lunch. Most people were still half asleep at this hour in the morning. I myself, was only halfway awake but I had to make myself look awake, that's were makeup came in handy.

The student center was a fairly large square area where everyone hung out. There were many wood benches and several tables and chairs place around. To the right and left were hallways where the class rooms where. If you continued walking through the student center you would again find two halls but these ones were different. One hall led to the cafeteria and gym and the other led to the office, the teacher lounge, and to the principle's office that was at the very end. No one really hung out in that hall at all, you can imagine why. Our school was a tall brick building and the walls were all plain white.

Looking around, I saw the different groups all hanging out in their designated areas. The popular people taking up the front and center while the others hung to the side and towards the back. You could easily see the disconnection between the groups. Fake smile still in place, I headed over to my friends who were seating on a bench near the wall.

"Hey Erin!" my friend Rachel said nudging Megan next to her. She looked up at me and gave me a smile hello. Rachel was tall, with an athletic build. She has the classic blonde hair, blue eyes. Megan was the complete opposite. She was short and plump, and had dark brown hair and dark brown eyes. Where Rachel was loud, Megan was quiet. Where one was good at something, the other wasn't so good at. Complete opposites; it was almost amazing that they had been friends since they were little. They balanced each other out. Somehow I fitted between the two of them and was pretty much the middle person.

"Hey guys." I said, dropping my black bag on the floor and took a seat next to Rachel.

"So did you finish the trig homework?" Megan asked looking hopefully at me. I smiled at her just as the bell for class rang.

"Yeah you can copy it during lunch." I grabbed my bag off the floor and stood up. "Let's go Rachel, Ms. Vine will have a fit if we are late to English again. You know that threat of detention isn't really appealing." I said with a smirk.

"Yeah, yeah, I hear you." Rachel grabbed her stuff and got up too. "We'll see you later Meg."

"Ok, I'm off to history. Later!" Meg started walking to one of the halls to the right.

"Bye" Rachel and I said in unison back to her and headed down a hall to the left soon getting emerged into the crowd that was starting to form.

Sitting in class has to be about the most boring thing in the world. It was late in the afternoon, the sun was beating down and a sweltering heat hung in the air. Half of the class was staring out the window, the teacher being none the wiser to realize no one knew what he was talking about or even listening. Every now and then I would check the clock, time seemed to be going so slow, each ticking of the clock seemed too long. Thankfully that this was the last class of the day. Five minutes to go. Four. Three. Two. One. God it was pathetic. Everyone was staring at the clock willing it to go faster. Finally when it seemed if the clock didn't move it was going to start going backwards, it moved and the bell rang. Everyone was practically running for the door. I grabbed my bag and headed out.

The student center was so loud it was almost unbearable. I quickly got through the crowd and out the door. Standing at my car was Rachel.

"Hey," I said as I got closer to the car and grabbed the keys out of my pocket. "You need a ride?" I asked unlocking the car and throwing my stuff in.

"Yeah if you can please."

"Sure get in." I got into my black car and sat down on the red and black seat.

"Have I ever told you how much I really like you car?" Rachel said taking an appreciative glace around. It was a custom job that my brother, Kyle, had done. The car was painted black and the interior was a mix of black and red, my favorite colors. This was the last thing he gave me; it was his going away present to me. I realized I had drifted off thinking about the car and then remembered the question Rachel asked.

"No. It is nice though huh?"

"Definitely." I started up the car and put it into first gear.

"So where am I taking you? Home?"

"No I have work today, so it's to the diner." Rachel reached into her bag that was on her lap and pulled out her uniform.

"To the diner it is." I left the parking lot and went left. The diner wasn't too far from the school, maybe a mile or two. Soon I was pulling into Betty's Bakery & Burgers. It was a peach colored diner that was cozy during the winter and cool during the summer. It was one of the better places to eat in town. It was usually pretty busy.

"Thanks for the ride Erin." Rachel gave me a hug bye and was off toward the back to the employee entrance. I turned back onto the road and headed away from the town, towards the hills, the trees, the ocean, and home. As I get home I park my car in the garage and walk into the house. I grab something to drink and then head outside. I walked to my secret spot and settle myself in the tree remembering how I found this spot.

AN- So this was the first chapter. I know it's kind of short, but I didn't want to start posting it and then have no one like it. I have the next part ready to post, just need at least 1 review before I post it. I don't want to put something up that nobody wants to read, that's just a waste. So hope you liked it and don't forget to push that little button in the corner and tell me what you thought!


	3. Secret Place and the Car

Well ShadowStar, you got your wish, here is the next part, thanks for being my first review, and thanks to everyone else that reviewed. Tell me what you think of this part.

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When we first moved to this town 3 years ago, my brother and I were totally miserable. Our mom had just died and our dad decided the best thing to do was move to a brand new town. No friends, no family to get away to. Home life wasn't the greatest if you know what I mean, my mom's death hit us all really hard and my dad chose to drown himself in alcohol. The ocean gave us something to do part of the time and there are plenty of stores around but nothing that really caught out interest. We went exploring one day and found this secluded area on a hill that was back towards the trees. It wasn't too far from our house, which was on the oceanfront. It gave you a perfect view of the ocean and town. The grass was soft and perfect to lay on. No one could ever find us there. It was a secret spot; the place we went to when we didn't want to go home. After a while of being there you felt completely calm, like you were able to face anything.

When my brother turned 16, he didn't come up with me as much anymore. Instead he would drive off to his friend's house. So instead of lying in the grass like we usually did I took up a new place. Towards the left was a great willow tree. It was tall and gigantic, growing from the earth like a fountain. It was strange that we never sat in it before. Lying on the grass by myself made me feel even more alone so I took to the tree. There was a slit in the curtain of leaves that made the perfect entryway. The trunk was shaped perfect for someone to lay back in. This was my spot now. Lying in the tree, watching the leaves dance with the wind, and through the slit, watch the tide hug and release the shore.

Sometimes my brother would come out and drag me from the tree, telling me it was too dark for him. So again we would lie in the soft grass and talk about everything, sometimes not even talking at all but understanding nonetheless. As his 18th birthday approached, the number of times he came became less and less and finally he didn't come at all. I hide myself back into the shadow of the tree.

After his graduation he decided to take a year off before going to college. This last March, he left altogether. Said he couldn't deal with dad anymore, packed all his stuff and left. Each of us has a healthy amount of money in saving so I knew he would be ok but it hurt so much when he left. The night before he left, he came up to our spot one last time. He told me he was sorry for everything bad he had done in the past to me and that he would always be my big brother but he just couldn't do it anymore. That he was going to leave the next day. I cried and asked him what was I suppose to do. He comforted me and told me that I was strong, stronger than him and I would be able to stand it till I graduated and then leave; that I would make something of myself and I would do great things.

We laid there for a while in silence, listening to the ocean below and in that moment exactly, I knew something deep within me changed. Something not seen but was there. I think my brother realized it too because he looked at me and told me he was going to really miss me. I had to stop myself from saying I was going to miss myself too and instead told him I was going to miss him too. As the last of the day was setting behind the horizon, he turned and looked at me with the smirk of his. I knew he was going to do something but I didn't know what. He instantly started tickling me and I erupted with laughter until I cried uncle. I told him that I wasn't going to be able to walk home because my sides hurt from laughing so much. He called me a sissy, and then told me he would give me a piggy back ride home and he carried me all the way home. I knew then that that would be the last moment of my innocent childhood and that I would never lay in the grass again. I would never again feel the soft blades tickle my face and find what shapes I could in the clouds. I would now sit in the tree, in my dark shade. The next day, my life would change forever.

When I woke up the next morning, everything felt different and wrong. When my brother left he took part of me with him. A part I didn't even realize was there, but he also gave me hope; hope that one day I would be able to leave this place too. I sat up in bed and cried for a while. Checking to see what time it was something caught my eye on the nightstand. There was a folded sheet of paper and an envelope that looked like it had something in it. With trembling hands I took the piece of paper and found out it was a goodbye letter in my brother's messy handwriting. That made me cry again. Once I finished again, I finally read it. It said that he loved me and would miss me. He explained that in the envelope was a pair of car keys and that I could go to Jay's house, his best friend, and pick up my car. He said that was why he never came to our spot for a while; he was busy working on a car for me. I had my license for a while now but no car. He said it was his going away/birthday present for me. He hoped I liked the car and that he would call or write once he got settled.

He went on to say some other things about doing well in school and stuff like that and he finished it with his sloppy signature. I was thankful that it was the weekend and could go over to Jay's house that day. It was only a couple blocks over. I closed the letter, open my nightstand, and put the letter into my diary. I quickly got out of bed and dressed. After I finished getting dressed, I walked back to the envelope and opened it up. Inside were my house keys but added to it was a new key that was attached to a red and black sparkly star key chain that had my name engraved in it. I put them into my pocket, ran out the door, and got to Jay's house in a few minutes.

Jay was sitting on his porch; he was expecting me. He was the only person that knew what really went on in my house. Him and my brother had been best friends since we moved here. His blue eyes meet mine and I gave him a small sad smile. He held out his arms to me and I ran into them, sobbing into his shoulder. He stroked my hair with one hand and rubbed my back with the other, whispering into my ear that everything was going to be okay. When I stopped crying, I pulled back from him. I knew my eyes were red rimmed.

"I must look like crap." I said.

"No, you look fine." Jay said wiping the last tear from my face with his thumb.

"Sorry about crying on you." I said looking down at the ground.

"No worries, it'll dry." He said looking down at his light blue shirt that now has a small wet spot on the shoulder. "You want to talk?" He asked. I nodded yes and we sat on the porch. He wrapped one arm around me and I rested my head on his shoulder. We sat talking for a while, reminiscing about old times and all the stupid things we had done. For a while we sat there quietly. I finally remembered my main purpose for being here in the first place.

"So is my car really here?" I asked looking up at him. His tan faced turned down to look at me. His blonde hair was covering one of his ocean blue eyes.

"Oh no, I sold it to some dude walking down the street yesterday." He said his lips curving into a smile. I hit him weakly on the chest and he started chuckling.

"Oh you better not have!"

"Yeah it is here. Come on." He got up and starting walking the side of this house where there was a large shed. I followed him and watched as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a key and undid the lock on the double doors. "Close you eyes." He told me turning around to look at me, holding the doors close behind him.

"Okay." I said with a sigh and closed my eyes. I heard him come around and put his hands over my closed eyes. "What are you doing?" I asked.

"Making sure you don't cheat." I felt him push me forward with his chest.

"Me cheat? Never!" I said with sarcasm and he laughed softly. I cautiously walk straight, taking only small steps. I felt one hand disappear and his other hand stretched to cover both of my eyes. I heard something click to the right. I guessed it was Jay turning on a light switch if there was one out here.

"Okay. I am going to take my hand off but you have to promise no peeking. Don't open your eyes until I tell you. Promise?"

"I promise. Cross my heart and hope to die." I said making an "X" over my heart. I felt his hand lift off my eyes and him move around me. Then I heard some ruffling. It sounded like a cloth or a tarp.

"Okay, you can open them now." I opened my eyes to see a shining black convertible with the top down. It was a cute1992 VW Cabriolet. The interior was a mix of red and black. My favorite colors. I slowly reached into my pocket and pulled out the key chain with that black and red star that matched perfectly with the car. It was my dream car. Kyle had asked me a while back what kind of car I wanted and I had told him a black convertible car with red and black interior.

"Wow." I said in a whisper. It was all I could say. I just stood there with a shocked expression on my face staring at the car.

"Kyle said he wished he could have seen the look on your face when you saw the car." He said. I looked up at Jay and he was just standing there with a big smile on his face.

"How? When?" I choked out, still staring at the car.

"Well a while back some guy was selling it for a very reasonable price. Kyle had told me that he was going to leave soon. He decided to get it as a going away present for you. We did the engine work, painted it and redid the interior. Took us a while to find a place where they did custom colored parts. Kyle wanted it perfect and by that expression on your face I think we came pretty close. We were doing it little by little."

"I can't believe this."

"Well are we going to stand here all day just looking at it or are we going to take it for a ride?" He asked with a mischievous smile. It took me a second to get myself working again.

"Yeah." I said starting towards the driver's side.

"Do I get a turn?" He asked hoping over the passenger door and landing in the seat.

"Maybe." I said with a wink. I put the key in the ignition and it started up with a steady purr. I put it into first and we took off.

We drove around for a while, cruising the coast. Around noon we stopped for a bite to eat and then I let Jay drive. Jay headed back to his house as the sun started to set. He stopped in front of his house, turned off the car, and handed the keys to me. We got out, sat on his porch, and watched the sun fade.

"It drives so smooth, almost like you are gliding over the road."

"Yeah. My dream car."

"No its not a dream anymore, it's real." He said correcting me.

"Yeah, only Kyle isn't here to be part of it" I said looking down at my hands in my lap, a single stray tear running down my check.

"Erin," I looked up to see Jay staring at me closely, leaning over towards me, "Kyle might not be here physically but he will always be with you. When you are in this car, he is with you. He presence is this car now."

"I know," I said quietly, "but it still hurts. It's all dad's fault. Oh crap!" I said hitting myself on the head.

"What?" Jay asked in alarm.

"Dad. He will be home by now and I am supposed to be making dinner. I've to go." I said standing up and Jay stood up too.

"Okay. Will you be okay?" He asked touching my arm.

"Yeah. I'll be fine."

"Okay. I'll see you soon. We should do this again sometime. Okay?"

"Yeah." I gave Jay a hug and started walking down towards my car.

"I'll call you soon."

"Okay, bye!" I called back climbing into the car and starting it up.

"Bye!" He called back and waved. I watched as he got smaller and smaller in the mirror as I drove away not knowing what danger was awaiting me when I got home.


	4. Getting Cleaned Up

**Warning:** There is an abuse scene first. Just want to make you all aware. It's nothing too bad. If you don't want to read it, skip down to the next horizon line and just know that Erin went home, found her dad drunk and still drinking, he got mad she was late and beat her up.

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_I shook my head to stop the memories, not wanting to remember what happened next. But as much as you want something not to happen, sometimes it does, and the memories came flooding back, chocking me with their emotions._

I carefully parked my car in the garage where my brother's car used to be. I walk to the front door and quietly open the door hoping my dad might not be home yet or asleep. But no such luck. He was sitting in the dark corner in his chair. The only light was the faint glow from a lamp on the side table, where a bottle of alcohol sat half full. Another bottle was already standing next to it, empty. I could smell the alcohol in the air and feel the waves of anger coming off of him.

"Where were you?" He growls, his voice is rough and filled with barely contained rage.

"I was at a friends house. I didn't realize how late it was. I'm sorry." I said looking down at the ground.

"Where is your good for nothing brother?"

"He isn't good for nothing, he knows how to do a lot of things; you just don't see it." I said, and then shrunk back, realizing I just crossed the line and may have made this 10 times worse. He gets up and walks over to me and gets into my face, his almost black eyes staring furiously into mine. I hate how he makes me feel so weak and powerless. How he can reduce me to nothing. He has the ability to make me feel inferior to him. The fact that I let him makes me angry with myself and angry with him for making me feel this way.

"What the hell did you say to me?" He said in a clipped voice.

"I said that he knows how to do lots of things and that you just don't see it." I say again, my anger getting the best of me. I stare defiantly into his eyes.

"Really and where is this brother of yours?" He asks. I know that he is even madder than I expected. Usually he would have yelled earlier when I said what I said and would have sent me to my room.

"He left because he couldn't take your crap anymore. He left and it's all your fault!" I shout at him. I wasn't prepared for what he did next and I never would have expected him to do what he did. He slapped me. Next, he punched me in the face with so much force that I ended up crashing to the floor, face first. I hit my nose hard enough that it started to bleed. He never had hit Kyle or me before, yeah, maybe a wall or two but never one of us.

"I'm the reason he left? More like you! Look at you! It's your fault! You probably made him go away! Don't you dare put the blame on me when you know it's your fault!" He gave me a kick in the stomach and I felt my ribs bend with the blow. My left eye was already starting to swell and my lip was split. I had managed not to cry yet because I didn't want him to know he had hurt me. I managed to kick at his knee. He yelped in pain and fell to the floor banging his head on the coffee table. As soon as I saw him hit the table my first instinct was to make sure he was okay but I didn't. I slowly stood up and walked over to him. I studied him for a minute and saw the rise and fall of his chest so I knew he was still breathing. I glared at him and felt nothing but hatred. I took one last glance around and then ran out to my car and drove back to Jay's house.

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I hid my car around the corner and made my way to his house. I didn't want to face his parents because I knew they would ask questions so I crept quietly to his window, the grass hardly making a noise beneath my shoes. I tapped on the window a few times. I heard some rustling and then the curtain were pulled back. Jay took one look at my face and immediately opened the window and helped me through which proved to be very difficult with my ribs hurting so much. Once inside I collapsed on the floor, leaning against the wall and he crouched next to me, taking in my bruises and cuts. 

"What happened?" He asked, concern in his voice.

"My dad, that's what happened." I said tears falling slowly down my face, my words coming out a little slurred from my split lip.

"He hit you?" He asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, I got home, found him drinking, as usual. He asked where I was and then where Kyle was. Called him good for nothing. I got mad and said something to him. He got even more mad and then hit me and told me it was my fault that Kyle left." I said the last words so quiet that I didn't know if Jay heard me. I looked into his eyes silently asking him if I was really to blame.

"Oh, Erin. It wasn't your fault and you know it. Kyle left because of your dad. It had nothing to do with you. You know he would have taken you if he could." Jay pulled me into a hug. I just leaned into him, not having the energy to do much else. "How did you get away?"

"I managed to kick him in the knee and he fell down. He hit his head on the coffee table. He was still breathing when I left but I didn't touch him." Jay pulled back and looked at me.

"We definitely need to clean you up. Come on, we have a first aid kit in the bathroom."

"No. I can't go out there, your parents will see me."

"No they won't. They aren't even here; they went on a trip. Now come on." He grabbed my hand and together we walked down the hall to the bathroom. He opened the door and turned on the lights. The bathroom was an ocean blue color. There were lights that had seashell covering, and the shower curtain was an ocean print with fish swimming on it. Jay brought me further into the bathroom, lifted me up, and sat me on the counter next to the sink. He reached into a cabinet next to the mirror, pulled out a first aid kit, and sat it next to me. My nose and lip had already stopped bleeding and my eye and lip were swollen. Jay said he would be right back and he disappeared out the door. A few moments later he reappeared with an ice pack to put on my eye, some medicine and a glass of water. I took the medicine first and then took the ice pack. I held it to my eye while he wiped the blood off my face. I winced when he cleaned my lip.

"Now I know I look like crap." I said remembering my words from that morning. It seemed so far away now.

"No you look fine."

"Yeah if your idea of fine is bruised and swollen." I said started to laugh and stopped instantly as I felt pain ripe across my side. I wince and held my side, willing the pain to go away.

"Lift up your shirt." Jay said looking at my side.

"No. It's nothing." I said, not daring to look him in the eye.

"Lift up your shirt." Jay said and I could tell by his tone that he wasn't going to give up until I did as he said.

"Fine." I said with a sigh, which made another stab of pain in my side. I reluctantly lifted up my shirt to reveal my stomach. The right side was already a dark blue and purple.

"Oh Erin. Like this is nothing." He sighed and looked through the kit for something to wrap around me. He carefully wrapped me up and then closed the first aid kit.

"Now it doesn't hurt so much to breath."

"Well I did the best I know how. I'm not a doctor."

"Thank you. I don't think I could have made it by myself." I leaned forward and gave him a hug. His arms came cautiously around me so as not to disturb my side. I let go after a bit and leaned back against the wall.

"We need to get you into some clean clothes." He said looking at the blood spots on my shirt and pants. "I'll be back." Jay disappeared through the door again and came back with a shirt and some shorts. I got down off the counter and took the clothes from him.

"Thanks." I said looking at the clothes.

"Your welcome." Jay put away the first aid kit and grabbed the ice pack and glass. "I'm going to go put these away and give you a couple minutes to get dressed. I'll wait for you in my room." I nodded and he left closing the door quietly behind him. I turned towards the mirror and finally looked at myself in it. I was a mess. My left eye was shining blue and purple, but was only half way swollen shut. The ice pack had helped a lot. My lip was puffy and purple. The cut was kind of deep. It might leave a scar. I carefully pulled off my shirt, not moving too much to make my side hurt more than need. I pulled the white shirt on, kicked off my shoes, and unbuttoned my jeans. I stepped out of them and got the pair of black shorts on, which was a little awkward but I managed to get them on. I grabbed my bloody clothes and shoes. I opened the bathroom door and shuffled my way down to Jay's room. I found Jay sitting on his bed lost in thought.

"Hey." I said dropping my shoes near the door. Jay looked up at me and I could tell he had been thinking about what had happened to me.

"Hey. Feeling better?" He asked standing up.

"Yeah, thanks to you. What do you want me to do with my clothes?" I asked.

"Oh I'm just set them on the table there, we'll wash them in the morning." He said pointing to a little table next to a pile of laundry. I walked over to him and grabbed his shirt.

"I got blood on you." I said as I saw the little bit of blood my nose and lip had left on him.

"Oh, I didn't even notice." He stood up and took off his shirt to revel a very muscular chest and arms. I've always had a slight crush on Jay. I mean, what wasn't there to like. He was a couple inches taller than me, around five' ten''. All tan, muscular body, blue eyes, blonde hair that was always falling into his eyes, it kind of gave him that mysterious vibe. I felt that flutter in my stomach when he looked up at me and smiled. I scolded myself for feeling like that. Jay probably looks at me like his best friend's annoying little sister I told myself. He tossed his shirt over to where my clothes were on the table. I stood there not really knowing what to do. I was really tired and yawned.

"You should get some rest. You could stay in the guest room." Jay said starting towards the door. I grabbed his arm as he walked by.

"Jay," I said in a frightening voice, "I don't want to be by myself, do you think I could sleep in here with you?" I asked looking down at the floor. I think Jay understood that I was still scared.

"Yeah. Come on." He walked over to the side of his unmade queen sized bed and got in. I went to the other side and gently got in. The bed was soft and the sheets were cool and smooth against my skin. Jay was laying on his side watching me get in, making sure I was ok. I gave him a smile to tell him I was ok. He turned around and turned off the lamp. The only light in the room was the moonlight from the window that fell across the bed.

"Jay?"

"Hmm?"

"Will you hold me till I fall asleep?" I asked in a small voice. I remembered all the times Kyle would hold me until I would fall asleep when I had a nightmare or dad got into one of his fits and I couldn't sleep.

"Yeah." Jay said after a moment. I turned towards him so I was sleeping on my good side. Jay was lying on his back and I moved forward so I could lay my head on his chest, my hand falling on his stomach. I could feel the hard muscle underneath it. It was odd how comfortable it was. I felt his arm come around me and he started rubbing my back. His other hand brought up the blankets around us. I eventually fell asleep with the steady rise and fall of his chest. It would be the first of the many times to come that I would run to Jay's house.

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Thanks for reading and don't forget to review! 


	5. Defining Moment

Here the next part. **Warning:** There is an abuse scene in this update. Again, if you don't want to read it, skip the paragraph that has horizontal lines above and below it and just know that Erin went home again, found her dad home early from work, he was drinking and he beat her up again.

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I shake my head to rid myself of the memories again, this time it worked. That had been about 3 months ago. Dad had said he was sorry the next day and me, being the naïve fool I am thinking the best of everyone, accepted it, but no less than two weeks later, when I had come home late, it happened again. I ran to Jay's again, he cleaned me up for a second time and I stayed the night. I became wary of all my actions and things had gone fine for about a month so I relaxed a little, and he found some excuse to get mad and once more it happened, starting this never ending abusive cycle. I was walking on eggshells now but he still found some reason to get mad. Right now I was on two weeks without an accident. My dad told me that if I ever told anyone about what happened, he would kill me. I know that if I told he would just deny it and put the blame on someone. Plus, no one would believe me. My dad is very two faced and people are quick to believe only what they want to believe about someone. Everyone thought my dad was perfect. No one saw what I saw or knew what Jay knew. My dad kept up a very good image for the community. I have never told him where I go or about Jay at all. If I did and word got out that I was being beaten, he would point the finger at Jay and I couldn't let that happen. I touched the tiny scar I had on my lip; it was my constant reminder of that night it all began. 

I checked my watch and saw it was around 6 o'clock. I needed to get home. I had to get dinner done. I had already been beaten once for not having dinner done on time. I made my way and slipped into to the house through the back door. I headed towards the kitchen but was stopped when a fist connected with my face. I could feel it collide with my jaw, snapping my head to the left.

* * *

Abuse scence- Skip if you want

"Where were you?!" He yelled, hitting me again in the face. He was wearing his rings this time and they cut my check. He reeked of alcohol. "I told you I was coming home early and for you to have everything ready! Why can't you do anything right?!" I blocked out whatever he said after that but I knew that that last line would repeat in my head for a while afterwards. I just tried to protect and defend myself. He grabbed me, threw me backwards into the countertop, my lower back hitting the edge, and continued to hit me. His first few hits were the ones that really hurt, everything else after that was barely anything. He would use all the energy in the first punch or kick. He finally tired himself out, the alcohol finally making him drowsy and he staggered over to the couch and collapsed. I ran out of the house and speed off to Jay's again.

* * *

These accidents always seemed to happen on Friday night, but even if there wasn't an accident I would come over and hang out with Jay, it was our little routine. He would know something was wrong when I climbed through the window instead of using the door. He was starting to fall into the habit of leaving his window open on Friday nights just incase. I crept quietly to Jay's window and climbed in. Jay instantly rushed over to me. He started keeping a first aid kit in his room too.

"Again?" I nodded yes. "What for this time?" He asked already sitting me on the bed and getting the kit out.

"He came home early and dinner wasn't ready." I said slowly the pain in my jaw getting less with use.

"Well it's not too bad this time." Jay was cleaning the cuts on my cheek. My cheek was cut, my jaw was sore and would probably have a bruise soon, and had some tiny bruises on my body. A slow throbbing was coming from my lower back but I didn't say anything. Nothing big, this was good compared to other times.

"Yeah, I guess I was lucky this time." I said chuckling at my luck. Jay had cleaned up my cuts and walked out of the room. I knew he was getting an ice pack for my jaw. He came back and we sat in silence while I iced my jaw. It was feeling better. I put the ice back down on the table and turned to look at Jay. He was watching me. He finally realized that I was looking at him and smiled. I smiled back at him feeling that flutter in my stomach again. Jay and I had grown even closer and began to date last month but nothing major had happened yet. We would stay up late when I came over and talk about everything. I trusted Jay more than anything in the world; I trusted him with my life.

"Jay!" A women's voice called outï‚¾it was Jay's mom. I looked wide-eyed at Jay and he pushed me towards his closet. Just as I was closing the door, his bedroom door opened. I watched through the slit in the door.

"Yeah mom?" Jay said calmly, like nothing was going on. I could feel my heart beating faster in my chest.

"I just wanted to let you know that your father and I are leaving to the conference and we might stay a couple extra days. A friend of ours is there and asked us if he could show us around the town and you know your father. So were are going to be gone for longer than we expected."

"Oh, that's okay Mom. No need to worry about me. I can take care of myself."

"I know. Okay so we're leaving. We will see you in 2 weeks." She gave him a kiss on the cheek and walked back out the door, closing it behind her. Jay walked over to the closet and slowly opened the door.

"Hey, you found me, man you're good at hide and seek!" I said playfully stepping out of the closet.

"Really? Always knew I was talented at something." He said with a smile. "Need some clean clothes?" I checked myself and saw a little bit of blood on my shirt that had fallen from my cheek.

"I guess." I answered as he went over to his drawer and grabbed the white shirt and black shorts that he always gave me.

"Here." He said handing them to me.

"Thanks." I said catching his hand as he handed it to me. I held his hand in mine. I felt like my whole body hummed at his touch. I stepped towards him my face tilted up to him. He was looking down at me, his eyes going from my eyes to my lips; my eyes were following the same course, first to his blue eyes and then to his soft lips. I couldn't explain this sudden need to kiss him. It almost scared me how much my body demanded his touch. We both came forward slowly, my lips barely brushing his and then again but stronger this time. Our lips meet repeatedly, taking longer sips each time. My arms went around his neck and the clothes fell, forgotten, to the floor. Jay put his hands on my hips and pulled me towards him. I moaned softly as I felt his tongue enter my mouth and softly played with mine. Pleasure was coursing through my veins and I could no longer feel the pain in my jaw, back, or anywhere else. It was like fire and ice running through me at the same time. I was just totally focused on Jay and this kiss; everything else fell into oblivion. My need for oxygen was starting to make my lungs burn and slowly I pulled back and took a deep breath; Jay did the same thing. I rested my forehead against his.

"Wow." Was all I could manage to breath out. All these new sensations were running through me.

"Yeah..." Jay said smiling at me and I smiled back. Jay was still holding me close and I could feel his hard muscle molded against my soft body. He looked into my eyes and I lost myself in them. I felt that flutter again. His eyes were like the ocean sparkling in the sun. I felt myself leaning up to recapture his lips. His lips met mine in slow, sensual kiss. My fingers unconsciously starting to play with the silky hair at the nape of his neck. One of his hands intertwined itself in my loose hair, while the other came to cup my cheek. His hand was cool against my flush cheek. Our kisses became more frenzied, each of us desperate to express the need for other. Soon our kisses slowed and then we stood there holding each other.

"That was... I don't think there is even a word to describe it." I said as I regained my breath and could make my brain function properly.

"Yeah that was..." Jay trailed off not being able to find a word to describe it either.

"Now about those clothes." I gave him a smirk, reluctantly letting him go.

"Those clothes..." Jay looked around and then looked at the ground and saw them lying in a heap next to us. He picked them up and handed them to me.

"So what are we going to do tonight? It's still pretty early." I asked looking over at his clock to see it almost 8 o'clock.

"You want to watch a movie?" He asked looking at the clock too.

"Sure."

"Okay. Why don't you get dressed, pick out a movie and I'll go make some us some popcorn, sound good?"

"Okay." I started to take off my shoes while Jay headed to the kitchen. I got dressed into the clothes and headed to the corner where his movie rack was. I skimmed over the columns and settled on The Mummy. I had never seen it before and vaguely remembered Kyle telling me it had been a good movie. I flicked on the T.V., basking the room in a faint blue glow and put the tape into the VCR. Grabbing the remote I plopped my self on the bed and waiting patiently for Jay to get back. After a couple minutes the door opened and he came in carrying a big bowl of popcorn in one hand, in the other were two sodas, and a bag of candy was dangling from his teeth. He walked over to the bed and I took the bowl of popcorn from him. He passed me one of the sodas and I set it on the nightstand next to the bed. He put the other stuff on the nightstand on his side and then settled next to me on the bed. I cuddled up to his side and he wrapped an arm around me. I put the bowl between us and reached behind me to find the remote. Jay turned off the lamp as I pressed the play button on the remote. We both starting eating the popcorn as the previews played.

"So what movie did you pick?" He asked reaching in the bowl for another handful of popcorn.

"You'll just have to wait and see, now won't you?" I said playfully and reached for some more popcorn. In a few moments the main credits showed on the T.V.

"The Mummy. Nice choice."

"I have never seen it before. Kyle said it was pretty good."

"Oh it's a good movie. Just don't scream too loud at the scary parts ok?"

"Scary parts?" I asked moving closer to Jay, who chuckled.

"Not so much scary as more surprising."

"Oh, well it can't be that bad."

"Ahhh!!!!" I screamed turning into Jay's side, causing the last of the popcorn to fly out of the bowl. I was clutching Jay's shirt and slowly willed my hands to relax and let go. I could feel Jay's firm chest rumble beneath my face. I hit him softly on the chest for laughing at me and mumbled jerk at him. Not my fault I wasn't expecting the mummy to fly out of the sarcophagus. I turned back to see a very disgusting mummy that look as they said on the movie "still juicy". I wrinkled my nose up in disgust. "Now that is just gross."

"Yeah maybe a little."

"Just a little?"

"Okay, maybe more than a little bit but it could be worse."

"I try not to imagine anything worse than what I see." Jay laughed. I looked down at the bowl and saw it empty but there were some pieces all over us. "Oops, looks like I made a little mess.

"Yeah I was just noticing that." Jay said setting the bowl on the floor and started to pick up the pieces that were on us and dropped them down into the bowl. I, on the other hand, started to pick up pieces and eat them.

"Well now that that little mess is cleaned up." I said popping the last kernel into my mouth. Jay stopped the movie and turned to look at me.

"How are you feeling?" He asked tilting my face to look at my jaw that now had a bruise.

"I'm okay I think. My backs a little sore." I winced as soon as the words left my mouth. I hadn't told him about my back and he would be upset that I didn't say anything.

"Your back?" Jay asked with a raised eyebrow and shook his head at me. "Why didn't you tell me?" I didn't answer him and instead picked off invisible lent from his shirt, not looking up to meet his eyes that I knew were studying me. "Lay on your stomach and raise your shirt."

"Do I have to?" I whined and looked up to see his serious eyes. Grudgingly I rolled onto my stomach, pulled up my shirt, and brought it over my head, tucking it underneath my chin. Crossing my arms I laid my head down. I heard Jay inhaled sharply and I didn't know if it was because of my back or something else. I turned my head and looked at him. He was studying my back intently, his eyes scrutinizing my lower back.

"I don't know if this is going to bruise or not."

"Is it that bad?" I asked turning my head even more to see a red two-inch wide line across my lower back.

"Well it's just red right now, not bruised yet so I don't know. How did this happen?"

"He threw me back into the countertop."

"Does this hurt?" He asked skimming his fingertips softly over it, sending shivers down my spine.

"Not really. It's feels more like a sore muscle right now."

"Well you know what works best for sore muscles?" He asked getting off the bed.

"What?" I asked looking back at him.

"A massage," Jay said with a smile. "Stay right there. Don't move." He slipped out of the room and I could hear him walk down the hall. He came back an instant later with a bottle in his hand.

"What's that?" I asked suspiciously.

"It's just lotion. Now relax." He came and sat next to me.

"Right, relax." I rested my head back on my arms and closed my eyes. I felt him pour lotion on to my back. The lotion was cold and I let out a hiss.

"Did that hurt?" Jay asked concern in his voice.

"No, it was just cold, I didn't expect it." I said taking a deep breath.

"Okay. Just tell me if I do hurt you." Jay slowly started rubbing my back. My body was tense at first but as I got use to the feel of his hands my body relaxed. Somehow, Jay lost his shirt and the clothes kept coming off. That night I would officially become a woman.

* * *

AN- I am **not **implying that to become a women you have to have sex. For the character, that was a defining point in her life that marked her as a women for her, so please don't get mad about it. Thanks for reading and don't forget to review. 


	6. Morning After and Going Back Home

"Morning sleepy head." Was the first thing I heard as I woke up. My head was pillowed on Jay's bare chest and his hand was playing with my hair.

"Morning." I said burying my head into his chest. His hand trailed down my back and sent shivers down my spine.

"So how are you feeling?"

"Good." I said looking at him. "You?"

"Good." Jay said smiling. I leaned up and gave him a light kiss.

"Hmm, I could get use to this." I said and began to trail her finger up and down his chest.

"I bet you could." Jay said with a wink. We lay resting for a little while longer.

"Okay, time to get up." I said stretching out. I got up taking a sheet with me and wrapping it around me.

"Let's go take a shower." Jay said getting up and taking my hand in his.

Later on after we had got dressed, we went into the kitchen.

"So what do you want?" Jay asked opening the fridge.

"How about omelets?" I said coming up behind him and wrapping myself around him.

"Sure." Jay said getting everything out. I let him go and set myself on the counter. Jay made breakfast and we ate. "So what do you want to do today?"

"I want to take you somewhere." I said finishing up my food.

"Where?" Jay asked setting our plates in the sink.

"It's a surprise. Come on." I said grabbing his hand. We left the house and walked down the street to where my car was parked. We got in and I drove to my house.

"Your house is the surprise?" Jay asked confused.

"No." I said getting out of the car. "Come on." Jay followed me to the back of the house. Holding Jay's hand I lead him to my secret spot. We got there in a few minutes. "Okay, this is it."

"Wow, this has a great view. You can see the whole town." Jay said holding a hand above his eyes to shield it from the sun that was hanging high in the sky.

"Yeah. Kyle and me found this place a little while after we came. We've never shown anyone it, except now you." I said leaning into his side. Jay looked down and smiled at me. "Come on, there's one more thing." I said pulling him back towards my willow tree. "Go sit in there." I said. Jay unsteadily climbed up and sat him self on the tree. I climbed in after him and laid myself down on top of him, resting my head on his shoulder.

"This is nice." Jay said rubbing my back.

"Yeah." The shade provided a welcoming reprieve from the heat the sun was creating. The zephyr wind made the leaves create a soft rustle.

"So this is what you wanted to show me?" Jay asked quietly.

"Yeah, I've never shown anyone this place, it's special." I said playing with the hem of his shirt.

"It's peaceful." He said slowly closing his eyes.

"I guess I really wore you out if you're going to sleep." I said smirking.

"You wish." Jay said opening one eye to look at me.

"Uh huh, and that's why you're falling asleep."

"No, I'm just resting my eyes."

"Sorry, that one doesn't work. I've heard it before."

"Did I already use that one?" Jay asked grinning.

"Yup."

"Let me think of a good one then." Jay said closing his eyes again. Within a couple of minutes I knew he had started to drift off when an idea popped in my head. Bracing my self against the tree I gave Jay a little nudge. He fell down and landed with a thump on the ground.

"Hey what did you do that for?" He asked rubbing his head.

"Whoopsie." I said feigning innocent.

"I'm going to whoopsie you." Jay said grabbing a hold of my foot and giving it a good tug, which I wasn't expecting. I landed next to me and he pinned me to the ground. I flipped him over and gave him a victorious smile.

"Ha!" I said.

"Hey look, what was that?" Jay said pointing over my shoulder. I, being dumb, looked over my shoulder. Jay immediately flipped us again so he was on top.

"Didn't anyone ever teach you not to bug sleeping people?"

"Sleeping people? I thought you were suppose to be thinking." I said with an amused smile.

"Well I was, didn't I ever tell you I get my best ideas when I'm asleep." Jay asked nuzzling my neck and placing butterfly kisses all over. I arched my back to give him better access.

"I think I love you." I murmured. Jay instantly froze.

"What?" He asked pulling back and looking me in the eyes.

"Nothing." I mumbled and felt blood rush to my cheeks.

"No, you said something. What did you say?"

"I said I think I love you." I said feeling embarrassed.

"Oh." Jay said looking surprised. "Well..."

"Look I'm sorry I shouldn't have said it. You don't have to say anything." I said trying to get out from underneath him.

"Erin, stop." Jay said and I froze. "I like you, a lot, but... I..." Jay sighed and grew a look of frustration. "I don't want to say it and have it mean nothing, not that I feel nothing, it's just I can't say that to you yet."

"It's okay." I said reaching a hand to cup his cheek.

"How about we go do something?"

"Like what?"

"How about we...go down to amusement park?" He suggested.

"Sounds fun." I said. Jay got up and then helped me up. Jay and I left, spending the entire day at the amusement park and only ended up losing each other once. It was after 9 when I pulled up to Jay's house to drop him off.

"I should be heading home. Dad is probably passed out on the couch." I said walking Jay up to his door.

"You could always stay another night." Jay said suggestively.

"I wish, but I've got homework and I've got to pass my classes if I want to graduate this weekend."

"That's right, I forgot it was this weekend."

"You're still going right?"

"Yeah, it's at 1 right?" Jay asked opening the front door.

"Yeah." I said leaning against the doorframe. "So I'll see you Saturday?"

"You bet." Jay said leaning into me. I wrapped my arms around his neck. We kissed good night and then I headed home.

Parking the car in the garage, I quietly tiptoed into the house. Just as I had predicted my dad was passed out on the couch, and almost empty bottle was hanging from his hand. As quietly as I could I cleaned up his mess and then went to bed.

The next day I got up and took a shower. I got dressed and then started to work on my homework. An hour went by before I heard the moans coming from the living room signaling that Dad was starting to wake up. I set my homework down and went into the kitchen. Filling a glass with water and grabbing two ibuprofens, I went into the living room. My dad looked wearily up at me. I handed him the glass of water and medicine.

"Thanks kiddo." My dad said after taking the medicine and setting the glass on the table. As he got up, I took a step back. "Oh kiddo, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." My dad said tears forming in his eyes. He clamped on to me and began to cry. I awkwardly wrapped my arm around him and patted his back. He was trying to say something but it was being mumbled into my shirt and I had no clue what he was say; he was probably trying to apologize. After a few minutes he pulled back and wiped his face. "I don't know how you deal with my crap." He said. "But this week is going to be different. I promise." He said. I only half listened because this was the same load of bull-crap he said every time. Suddenly something was pushed into my hand. I looked down and saw it was a roll of bill.

"What's this for?" I asked.

"It's your graduation present." He said. "You are graduating this weekend right?"

"Yeah."

"Well at least I got one thing right." He mumbled. I looked at him with pity. "I'm going to go take a shower; why don't you make some breakfast?"

"Sure." I said, knowing that agreeing with him was the only way to keep things peaceful. He lumbered down the hall and disappeared into his room. I soon heard the shower turn on. I put the roll of money in my pocket and then headed into the kitchen to start making breakfast. By the time he returned I was setting his plate of eggs, bacon, and harsh browns down.

"Where's my coffee?" He said gruffly.

"Right here." I said putting down a cup of black coffee with trembling hands. He grunted in thanks. I grabbed my plate and we ate in silence.

"I'm going out. I'll be back by dinner, which I expect to be ready by the time I get here." He said, grabbing his coat and leaving out the front door. As soon as I heard his car leave I breathed a sigh of relief. I finished my breakfast with steadier hands and then cleaned up. After I cleaned the house I returned to my room and finished my homework. After that I took a little break and watched TV. A few hours later I looked at the clock and saw it was after 4. Dad would be back soon. I shut the TV off and got up to make dinner.

My dad returned at 5:30 and saw that everything was to his satisfaction. Dinner was tense and quiet. Once dinner was finished Dad sat on the couch and watched TV. I cleaned up trying to make as little noise as possible. I had already learned my lesson on making noise when he was watching TV. The pale scar on my arm was a reminder; it was a result from him getting mad because I was making too much noise and he threw at plate at me, which imbedded in my arm. I finished cleaning and then poked my head around the corner. Dad was snoozing lightly; I quietly walked over to him and covered him with a blanket. Treading softly I went back to my room and shut the door. I changed into some pajamas and sat down on my bed. I closed my eyes for a sec when the phone began to ring. I jumped up instantly and grabbed the phone, not wanting to wake up my dad.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hey." A familiar voice said.

"Kyle, is that you?" I asked.

"Of course it's me. How's it going?" He asked.

"It's going." I said. "How about you? How are you doing?"

"I'm doing great."

"That's good."

"So, you graduate yet?"

"This weekend, hopefully." I said with a sigh.

"Don't worry. I have faith in you."

"So, where are you at?"

"Some hotel in Florida. I wanted to get some sun, hit the beach, meet some babes." He said laughing.

"And how's that going?"

"Oh, it's going pretty well. How are things at home?" I could have sworn my heart stopped beating at that exact moment. My skin broke out in a light sweat and it felt a little harder to breath.

"Same crap, different day." I said lying and hoping I sounded convincing. _What the heck am I lying for? Especially to Kyle. _I told the little voice in my head to shut up and tried to pay attention to what Kyle was saying. Kyle and I talked for a little while before he said he had to go and we hung up. I felt better knowing that Kyle was doing better.

I cleaned up my room and listened to the radio for a while but I was restless. Throwing on a sweater and shoes, I locked my door and snuck out my window. I headed up to my secret place and sat in the willow tree, staring at the ocean that was like a phantom shadow the came and went. I watch the stars twinkle through the slit in the tree. My eyes became heavier and I fell asleep listening to the crashing tide.

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Hope you guys liked and don't forget to review! 


	7. Disappointments and Shock

So here is the much awaited next chapter. As some of you have seen, I've decided to tie in this story with July Jones, and I suggest reading that before this story, but if you really don't want to read JJ, e-mail me and I can try and write you a summary of the story. Anywho, now to the chapter.

* * *

I woke up the next morning chilled to the bone. I instantly panicked when I realized I wasn't in my bed but calmed down as I remembered where I was. I had fallen asleep in the tree. Stiffly, I climbed down and stretched out the kinks I had got from sleeping in the tree. I jogged down to my house in hopes of warming up a bit. I climbed back into my room and saw it was only 7:15, the time I normally wake up. _Thank god for internal alarm clocks. _I took a hot shower, got dressed and applied some heavy makeup to disguise the fading bruise on my jaw. There wasn't much I could do for the cuts on my cheek. I was a fast healer and they were already healing nicely. _Nicely. There's nothing nice about them._ I styled my hair to cover the right side of my face to further hide my bruise and cuts, which luckily were both on the same side. 

I heard the alarm go off in the other room and quickly went to the kitchen. I made breakfast and coffee, setting them on the table just as my dad came in. He didn't say anything to me, just ate, drank his coffee and left. I ate some toast and cleaned up. Grabbing my school bag from my room I locked the front door and left to school.

* * *

The week passed by in a blur, finishing last minute projects and late night phone calls to Jay. We called each other at night since I had school and he had work. Friday the seniors were given a congratulations party, which was lame, but we were allowed to leave school early. I was so nervous about graduation. We had been having practices all week but I couldn't stop this fear I had that something bad was going to happen. 

I woke up Saturday to find the house completely quiet. There hadn't been any problems Friday so I had stayed home since Jay had to work a double shift. I quietly crept into the kitchen to find a note on the fridge.

_Erin,_

_Had to go on a business trip. Can't make your graduation. There is a box for you in the hall closet. Behave till I get back. Keep the house clean. There is some money in the envelop on the counter. I'll be home next Saturday at noon._

_Dad_

I slumped again the wall and began to cry as I finished reading the letter. I really shouldn't have cared if he was going to be there or not since he had done so much crap to me but it hurt. A lot. He was still my dad and I still needed him to be there.

I wiped my face dry on my sleeve and stood up. I spotted the envelope on the counter that looked rather bulky. I left it there and went down the hall to the closet. Opening it I found a box labeled Erin. Taking it with me I carried it to my room and sat on my bed. I opened it and found some of my mother's old things. A ring that I immediately put on and it fit perfectly on my right ring finger. I looked at the ring closely and remembered this was the ring that my grandma had given my mom on her graduation. I felt the tears come to my eyes but held them back.

There were a couple of pictures, most were of us but there was one I had never seen before. It was of my mom with another woman. She was as tall as my mom but she had honey eyes and jet-black hair. Her resemblance to my mom was uncanny. They looked like twins except my mom had darker brown eyes. Personally, I look like my mom. I had the same facial features, body built, and complexion, but had my dad's reddish-brown hair. But the lady in the picture could have easily passed as her twin or sister.

I checked the back of the picture and read, "Robin and Me." Robin had to be the name of the other lady since my mom's name was Caroline. I studied the picture again as the name Robin repeated in my head. It had to be a relative. I wouldn't be getting any answers soon since dad wasn't here, not that he would necessarily tell me anything. I'd be more afraid to ask because of his reaction. When it came to things about mom he either went postal or got depressed.

I look down at the box and pull out the last thing: a small wooden box. It's made out of beautiful cedar wood and the lid was carved with intricate designs and in the middle of it was my name. Opening the lid, I find green crushed velvet, a small mirror and a fairy standing on its tiptoes. The fairy's outfit is painted lilac and purple and her brown hair tumbles in waves as her wings poke through it, glitter making them reflect in the light. I immediately fell in love with it. I found the crank on the bottom and winded it up. A melody began to pour out of it and it sounded so hauntingly familiar, yet I couldn't place it. I shut the lid with a smile and put everything back in the box.

I was going to graduation by myself. Sadness filled me but then I thought of Jay and perked up a bit. I went about getting ready, taking a shower, getting dressed, and fixing my hair. I took out the dry cleaning bag from my closet, the maroon outfit seen clearly through the plastic. My mom's ring was a comforting weight on my finger and I knew she was with me.

Sitting around, I waited for the time to pass until I had to be at the high school. I had an hour to go when the phone rang. I sat up and grabbed the phone off my nightstand.

"Hello?"

"Hey Ms. Graduate! How's my favorite sister?" a familiar voice asked.

"Kyle, I'm your only sister so I have to be your favorite sister," I said back with a smile.

"Well, that's just logic and I'm not logical."

"Could have told you that," I mumbled.

"So how are you doing?" he asked turning serious.

"Nervous."

"That's a given. Dad going with you?"

"No," I said dejectedly.

"What! Why not?" Kyle asked in a raised tone.

"I got a note on the fridge this morning that said he had a business trip."

"That's crap. What an ass. I would be there if I was closer but…"

"I know," I said with a sigh.

"Well good luck with graduation, I know you'll do great," Kyle said with enthusiasm.

"Yeah, as long as I don't fall down on my face."

"Knowing you, you just might," he said with a laugh.

"Hey! I thought you were suppose to be calming me, not making me more nervous."

"Is Rachel and Megan walking with you?" he inquired.

"Yeah, we got to be the only group of three."

"Well, if you start to fall, just grab onto them and you'll all fall," he said with a laugh.

"Ha ha Kyle," I replied dryly.

"Sorry. Anyways, good luck and congratulations."

"Thanks."

"Mom would be proud of you," Kyle said and a silence followed.

"I better get going, I still have to get ready," I said wiping the tears that had gathered in my eyes.

"Okay, I love you."

"Love ya too."

"Bye."

"Bye," I said and hung up the phone. Grabbing my keys and my graduation outfit, I run out the door.

* * *

The high school was over crowded and I made it backstage, finding Rachel and Megan together. 

"Hey guys," I said giving them each a quick hug.

"Come on, put on your gown," Rachel said fixing her cap. I take the gown out and slip it on.

"Who wants to zip me up?" I asked fluttering my eyelashes.

"I will," Megan said, zipping me up.

"Okay, time to lay some ground rules," Rachel starts. "One, no crying, two, no depressed thoughts, and three, no crying. Got it?"

"Got it," Megan and I said back.

"Hey! Three musketeers! We're lining up!" someone yells from the front. Looping an arm in each other's, we made our way to the front and lined up.

The auditorium air was warm as everyone was crammed together. Coming in from the side doors, I searched the room for Jay and a sliver of fear worked its way into my chest as I couldn't find him. Convincing myself the he was just lost in the crowd, I kept going, taking my seat as the principal began to talk.

The ceremony was long and it felt like forever before I was walking across the stage and receiving my diploma. I could hear Megan and Rachel cheering as a polite applause came from the crowd. I looked out to see if I could spot Jay and was disappointed when I couldn't. Taking my seat once again, I cheered for Megan and Rachel as they walked the stage.

The principal finally pronounces our class and everyone throws off their caps. I toss mine halfheartedly and catch it on its way down. The band starts up the graduation march as we file out. We are given another speech backstage before we're released. I quickly lose Rachel and Megan as they find their families and the crowd swallows me up. I search frantically for Jay and am almost in tears when I reach the end of the crowd and can't find him. Suddenly I'm grabbed by the arm and I turn in hopes, thinking it was Jay. I quickly cover my disappointment with a smile as I am confronted by Megan instead.

"Come on, we want to take some pics together," she said pulling me. Almost everyone has left by the time Megan's parents quit taking pictures and I turn to my two friends.

"Have either of you seen Jay?"

"No why?" Rachel asked.

"He was supposed to show."

"Maybe he got stuck at work?" Megan suggested and I latched onto the idea, refusing to think anything different. After a drawn out goodbye, I headed home.

* * *

As soon as I stepped in the door, I picked up the phone and called Jay's cell: no answer. Trying his house next, I got the same thing. Pacing the room, I tried to figure out where he was. I quickly took off my cap and gown and grabbed my keys again. My knot of fear had doubled and I couldn't help but feel like something was wrong. 

Peeling out in my car, I did a quick sweep of the town before heading over to his house. I knocked on his front door but no one answered. Hoping his window might be open, I headed over to his room. Fortunately, it was open and I could see Jay in bed, his back facing me. I almost broke out into hysterical giggles as I climbed my way in and walked over to his bed.

"Hey, what happened…" to you died on my lips as Jay rolled over and I could see someone else in the bed next to him; a female someone else, and a naked one at that. I stood in shock as Jay's eyes opened.

"Erin, what…" Hay turned and looked in the direction of my stare.

"Oh my god," I whispered as a silent tear fell down my cheek.

"Erin, it's not what you think," Jay said as he sits up, the sheets falling down and I can see he's completely naked.

"Oh, it's not, is it? Then why are you naked?"

"Look, I can explain," Jay says as he looks away, searching for some pants.

"I don't think there's much to explain," I said sadly as I backed away. Jay finds some shorts and jams them on. Walking towards me, he stretches out his hand and I recoil closer to the window.

"Erin, I…" Jay starts as he drops his hands.

"Please, just don't. Anything you say is just going to make this worse."

"But-."

"No, we're done," I said in a strong voice. "Don't call me," I said as I scrambled out the window. Slamming my car door, I screech from his house as the front door opens and Jay runs out after me. I push down harder on the gas and the need to get as far away as possible consumes me.

I drive for an hour before heading back home. I park my car and take in the darken house; no one is there for me. I slid out of my seat and head out back to my secret spot, climbing up into me spot and think. The day drags on as I become numb.

* * *

Laying in the darkness, I allow myself to be shadowed by the blackness of the night. The moonlight shines through the leaves of the willow tree. The smooth bark was cold against my skin. All was quiet except the wind that blew softly creating the gently rustle of the leaves. How long had I been sitting here, hiding myself within the tree? Who knew; time seemed immeasurable at the moment. This was the place that calmed me down so why wasn't it working? 

I hear a twig being broken and sit up, alert. I climb down and peer out, instantly regretting it. Jay is standing a few feet in from of me with a bouquet of flowers. Taking a deep breath, I step out from the shelter of the tree and cross my arms.

"What do you want?" I asked and I could see Jay flinch at the coldness in my voice.

"Erin, you have to let me explain," Jay said taking a step closer. He holds out the flowers to me. I offer an insincere smile before grabbing them and throwing them on the ground, stomping on them.

"I can't believe you," I finally ground out.

"Look, it was a big mistake, what I did, and I know that," Jay said looking at the ground.

"How long?"

"What?" Jays asked looking up.

"How long?"

"This was the first time," he admits.

"Guess I was lucky then, catching you on the first time," I said bitterly.

"It wasn't like that."

"Just answer me one question: why? I mean, I saw that she was prettier than me but why?"

"It wasn't that she was prettier than you or anything like that."

"Then why?" I demand.

"Because I was scared!" Jay yells.

"What?" I asked confused.

"I was scared, alright? You had just said the 3 words and then I panicked. We went to the amusement park and I meet Lauren-."

"When I lost you," I said finishing his sentence.

"Yeah, and it wasn't like I meant to. It was just you said the 'L' word and I panicked," he said repeating himself.

"And that gives you means to cheat on me with a girl you've known for a week?"

"Yes, no! You just said that word and I…"

"So this is all my fault then?" I asked indignantly.

"No! I was stupid, me, it was my fault."

"Well, at least your man enough to admit that," I said looking away.

"Look, I came to say sorry. I was hoping you could forgive me and we could still be together. I know I hurt you and I'm sorry. I love you," Jay said looking up into my eyes. It was a bittersweet moment; I'd finally heard the words I longed to hear and it hurt me more than anything to hear them. I closed my eyes as I tried to control my emotions.

"Go away," I finally said so quietly, I wasn't sure I had said it out loud.

"What?"

"Go away,' I repeat.

"But Erin I thought…" Jay trails off.

"Jay, you don't realize what you've done, do you? I trusted you completely. I let you take care of me when my dad hit me; I gave you my innocence and you betrayed me. And I told you that you didn't have to say it back! I told you that I understood about you not being ready to say it!" I shout.

"Just because you say that doesn't mean you weren't expecting me to say it back," Jay said heatedly.

"It didn't! I never expected any of this. I didn't know I would feel this way about you and I never expected anything back from you! So don't tell me what I expect because you've just shown me today that you don't love me, you don't know me, and that you don't respect me."

"You know that a bunch of crap!" he yelled stepping closer.

"I do? That's why you cheated on me? Huh? Just say the truth! I never meant anything to you. I was just another little conquest for you!" I shout and let out a yelp of pain as Jay hit me. I touch my lip and pull back a blood covered finger.

"Oh my god Erin, I am so sorry," Jay said as a look of horror appears on his face and he stares down at his hand.

"Leave, right now!" I scream at the top of my lungs as tears begin to cling to the edges of my eyes. "You piece of crap! I never want to see you again!" Jay takes one last sorrow filled look at me before taking off down the hill.

My knees buckles and I fall to the ground, curling into a ball and letting myself go. The grass absorbs my blood and tears as sobs rack my body. Rolling onto my back, I stare at the sky. The world seems so big; it was like I was in a giant snow globe. It hit me then how alone I was. Everyone I loved had left or hurt me. I couldn't blame my mom for leaving since she died in a car crush when a drunk driver hit her; that's why I found it so ironic that Dad started to drink after the accident.

Kyle had left because of my dad and if I looked hard enough, I would find my slight bitterness and resentment towards him for leaving me. But now I had lost Jay, my rock, my protector. I was a girl alone in a big world. I couldn't stay here with all the memories swirling around me. Wiping the tears and blood from my face, I stood up and headed to my house; I had a plan.

* * *

So that's the end of this chapter, hope you enjoyed it, and oh look a little button for you to let me know what you thought! heh! 


	8. Destruction and Meeting Someone New

So I wasn't going to post this till Friday but then Megan begged me to post it so here it is, early. Hope you enjoy it Gin!

* * *

Slamming open the kitchen door, I snatch the envelope of money off the counter, jamming it into my pocket, and made my way to the bathroom. I check my face and it's ironic that the cut Jay gave me is in the exact same spot that my dad hit me for the first time; the scar is opened and I know that when it heals the scar will be even more predominant.

I clean my swollen lip and then walk to my room. Grabbing out my two suitcases, I dump all my stuff in and then take them out to my car. Heading back in, I scurry to my dad's room and over to his desk. The top drawer is locked and I give it a kick, the cheap lock breaking under the force. Taking any papers I would need, I walk back to my room.

Taking my clock off the wall, I forcibly throw it on the ground, not having the patience to deal with unscrewing the back. I kneel and take the money that is revealed; the wad tucked into my pocket with the envelope. Grabbing the box of my mom's stuff, I take a last look before heading back outside. After placing everything in my trunk, I stare at the house that has been my source of pain for the last couple months. A need for destruction and chaos takes over me and I stalk back inside.

Grabbing a matchbook from the kitchen drawer, I open the cabinet where the liquor was stored. I began throwing the bottles around; as each bottle breaks, I could feel my anger being released. With the last bottle in hand, I unscrew the cap and begin to walk towards the front door, letting the alcohol pour out behind me. I dump the last of it on the rug and let the bottle fall empty to the ground.

Walking down the front steps, I take out the matches and pull a single one out. Striking it, I let it burn. Finally, I flick it towards the front door. It twirls in the air before hitting its mark; the trail of alcohol ignites and soon it spreads to the rest of the flammable liquid and the house begins to smoke. I watch, satisfied, as the house engulfs in flames and smoke begins to billow out; the hot flame of the fire matching the one of anger inside me. Faintly, I hear the sirens in the distance. As I hear them come closer, I hop into my car and take off, one destination in mine: LA.

So why LA? First of all, it was all the way across the continent, and second, my grandmother lived there and I knew I could probably get answers from her on this unheard of 'Robin'. My fingers drummed the rhythm of the music as I flew down the high way with the top down. If felt nice to be free for once.

I pulled up to a gas station a few miles out of town and purchased gas, a map, and some food as the attendant eyed me warily. I knew that the cut and bruise on my lip was drawing more attention then I hoped for. I flashed him a smile and paid for my stuff. Just as I was about to exit, the TV caught my attention.

"_Starting off the news tonight, a house fire is the current task for local firefighters. A house on Shepard Hill went up in flames around 9 o'clock this evening. The fire is currently 80 percent contained and fortunately has not spread to surrounding area. The house belongs to local resident Arthur Gilroy. His current employer stated that he was out of town for the week. The whereabouts of his daughter Erin, age 18, are unknown. Police suspect that the teenager may have been inside the house but it is unconfirmed until an investigation can be conducted. The creation of the fire is also unknown and no eyewitness were present…"_

"That's horrible. I hope the girl is okay," the attendant commented.

"Yeah, me too," I said quietly.

I quickly walked out the door as the newscast began to report on a different story. I dumped the items in my car and paused; the worry of getting caught faded and I felt more liberated than anything. Looking up at the sky, I could see the dark cloud of smoke that curled in the night sky, the outline of it barely visible.

Jay would probably hear the news and go bonkers thinking I was still in the house. I gave a cynical laugh thinking of the worry he probably would do. Serves him right, the ass. I would call Megan and Rachel when I got to LA and let them know I was alive. Probably would be a good idea to get a cell, I mused.

I stretched out before getting back into my car. Reversing out of my spot, I veered back onto the highway and set out.

* * *

I had just entered LA about a week later when I heard a strange noise coming from my car. I immediately pulled over and turned on my emergency lights even though the highway was pretty empty as the later hour of the night. I circled my car and let out a groan as I found the source of my problem: I had a flat. I kicked the flat tire and pouted. This was so not what I needed.

I opened my door again and popped the trunk. Lifting up the mat, I pulled out the spare, jack, and wrench. _So how did Kyle do this again? _I stared down at the tire and let out a sigh. I set the jack on the ground and paused as a car stopped behind me. I looked over to see a black car with fireworks painted on the hood; it was impressive. What I thought was the passenger door opened vertically and a girl got out.

"Need some help?" she asked closing her door. When she turned to me, the hair on the back of my neck stood on end. This girl looked exactly like the one in the picture I found; though her eyes were a different color but there was no mistaking the similarities.

"Yeah, help would be great," I said as I regained use of my mouth.

"Whatcha got, oh a flat. Simple, we'll have it fixed in no time," she said pulling her long black hair into a bun. I nodded absently and handed her the wrench. I watched blankly as she fixed the tire and then got up.

"Okay, all done. Hey are you okay there?" she asked waving a hand in front of my face, bringing me out of my stupor.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just you remind me of someone," I replied honestly.

"I get that sometimes," she said with a smirk, her sky blue eyes flashing in amusement. "Here's a card to the place I work. We'll put some new tires on for you and give you a tune up since you've been driving for quiet a while," she pulled out a white business card from her wallet and passed it to me. DT Automotive, it said.

"Thanks, but how do you know I've been driving for a while?"

"You're plates."

"Oh," I said feeling dumb. She let out a laugh and set the flat tire and tools in my trunk.

"So just drop by and we'll look over it, make sure everything okay," she said closing the trunk.

"Thanks for the help."

"No problem. See ya around," she replied as she began to walk to her car.

"Wait, what's your name?" I asked and crossed my fingers, hoping she would say Robin; but in the back of my mind, I knew it couldn't be true, the girl was too young.

"July, but everyone calls me JJ," she said opening her door.

"I'm Erin."

"Well Erin, nice to meet you. Hopefully you'll bring your car by and we can hang," she said and waved bye before getting in her car. It fired up and she honked the horn before dashing out onto the highway. I scrambled into my car and took off after her, but lost her. I let out a defeated sigh before pulling into the closest hotel; I could find my grandma's house tomorrow.

* * *

July parked her car in her driveway before heading over to the fort. The party had already got underway and the music pulsed from the house. She walked in the front door and was promptly intercepted by Vince.

"Hey, what took you?" he asked with concern as his arms encircled her.

"I was almost out of town by the time I lost the cop and then I stopped to help some girl that had a flat on the side on the road," she answered.

"I was worried something happened to you," he said kissing her lightly on the lips.

"Nope, just helping someone," she murmured against his lips.

"Do you guys always have to be doing that?" Leon asked as he entered the living room.

"You're just jealous," July told him. Leon muttered something incoherent before heading towards the kitchen.

"Go easy on him," Vince said pulling her down onto the sofa.

"I'm guessing he's still sore from Letty."

"Yeah and I don't think Letty getting with Mike helped any," he explained. "I'm not saying that Letty and Mike together are wrong," he added when July looked like she was going to argue, "I'm just saying that I think it hit him harder then he would have liked."

"When did you get all perspective?" she asked leaning close to him.

"Being with you can make a lot of changes," he replied. "Good changes," he added and captured July's lips.

* * *

July woke up with a scream and it died in her throat as she realized she was in bed. Vince sat up and put an arm around her. As he pulled her to him and rocked her back and forth, the nightmare began to fade away, the image of Arnold and the knife growing fainter. It had been almost 10 months since the real nightmare happened, but every once in a while she would have a dream about it. Mike told her sometimes he even did.

"Nightmare?" he asked even though he knew the answer. July nodded yes against his chest. Vince's arms came around her, securing her to him and July felt safe. Vince pulled her back towards the bed and she snuggled up against him, savoring the feeling of his skin on hers. Whenever he touched her, it caused little sparks of electricity to cover her skin. He rubbed her back and kissed her forehead. She knew how lucky she was to have Vince and wouldn't trade him for the world.

"Feel better now?" he asked.

"Yeah," she replied sleepily. "Love you."

"Love you too baby, now sleep," he told her as she closed her eyes and drifted away.

Vince had moved in with her about a week after the 'kidnapping'. July loved waking up to him every morning. Mike and Letty moved into the same room a while after too and were very happy together.

Amy had taken over Letty's room when July asked her to move in. Secretly, July felt bad for Amy. After the whole fiasco, her mom had fallen apart and Max moved far away, glad to be free of his dad's controlling hand. Amy was left on her own and July felt sorry for her and asked Amy to move in with them. Although she was over with Jesse ninety-nine percent of the time, July didn't care.

Amy and Mike had just finished their senior year and graduated last weekend. Mike helped out at the garage and was working at Racer's Edge too, taking Brian's old job; Amy helped Mia down at the store during the week. It all worked out perfectly.

* * *

Erin woke up with a groan, the smell of the hotel room almost making her gag. She quickly got out of the bed and dressed. Picking up all her stuff, she checked out and got back to her car. Now was the time to see if she still remembered LA. Pulling onto the road, she took various turns and ended up on the right street. She cruised down it and took in the new houses.

Pulling up to a white two story house, she parked her car and looked around. Everything was still the same, the lawn green and trim and not one thing out of place. That was the way her grandmother was: strict and neat. Erin walked up the walkway and knocked using the brass knocker on the door. She shifted from foot to foot as she waited. The door finally creaked open and an old, weary face greeted her.

"Erin?" the man asked opening the door wider.

"Hey grandpa," she said as she took the older man into a hug.

"What are you doing here?" he asked as he let her go.

"Came to visit for now, maybe move out here."

"Rosemary, come look who's here."

"What is it Tom? Oh my goodness," the older women gushed as she saw Erin and gave her a brief hug.

"Hi grandma," Erin said quietly, her grandma always making her feel intimidated.

"Does your father know you're here?" she asked and Erin almost cursed at her luck.

"Not exactly," she replied wearily.

"Oh for goodness sake's Rose, let her in and we can all talk," Tom said as he grabbed Erin's arm and escorted her in.

Erin swirled her spoon in the tea her grandmother had set in front of her and stared as the slice of lemon twirled in the cup.

"Now you were saying about you're father not knowing?" her grandmother prompted.

"Well, he was on a business trip and I kind of spontaneously decided to come see you guys, since you know I haven't seen you guys in a few years," Erin answered and Tom gave her a warm smile. Erin looked up to see her grandmother poised and impassive, not one black strand of hair out of place.

"So you're saying that you drove all the way from the east coast by yourself and without your father's consent?" Erin frowned at the way it sounded.

"Yeah."

"Well, I'll have to call your father immediately and let him know you're okay," she said as she stood up from the table.

"Don't mind your grandmother, she's being a mother," Tom said quietly to her and Erin gave him a smile. "Now tell me what happened to you lip," he asked eyeing the fading bruise and half healed cut.

"Oh this, I feel down and hit my lip, nothing serious," Erin lied. They sipped their tea in silence until Rose returned to the room.

"I've learned the most interesting thing," she commented as she sat down and locked her eyes on Erin.

"What's that?"

"Your father returned home to find the house burnt down to the ground."

"What?" Erin said with fake shock. "When…when did that happen?"

"Last Saturday. Everyone thought you had died in the fire," Rose said as her eyes searched Erin's face for answers.

"Did you tell him I was okay?" Erin asked with mock concern.

"Yes, he says he's coming here."

"Oh, that's good," Erin replied as her insides began to squirm. The last person she wanted to see was her Dad.

* * *

So that's the chapter, don't forget to review and let me know what you think. 


	9. Digging Through the Past and New Arrival

July paced the foyer as she waited for Miriam to show up. She had been putting this off for a while and needed to get it done; she had to go through her parents' room. The thought of it sent her stomach into knots but that was why Miriam was coming. It wasn't that she couldn't do it with someone else it was just that Miriam could explain and help her out. There was something calming about the women and she was going to need all the calmness she could get. The doorbell ringing startled her and she quickly opened the door. Miriam stood clutching her purse as her hand unconsciously wrung the strap.

"Hi," July came forwards and gave her a tentative hug.

"Hello," Miriam replied as she entered the house and looked around.

"How are you?"

"I think I should be asking you that. How are you?" she asked as she stared straight into her eyes. July took a deep breath and let her shoulders sag a bit.

"I'm doing better. I still get nightmares every once in a while but it's getting better," July answered and she gave Miriam a half smile.

"I wish I could have known so I could have warn you," Miriam said back as her eyes watered a bit.

"No, you couldn't have known. Even Charlotte didn't know. If I've learned anything in the last couple months is that you can't blame yourself for something you can't control or for other people," July said as she gave Miriam's hand a squeeze. Miriam gave a sniffle and softly dabbed at her eyes.

"Well," she sniffled again, "I suppose we should get started."

"Yeah." July started up the stairs as Miriam followed her. Walking down the hall to her parent's room, she felt like her feet had turned to lead and each step took more effort than the last. Once they were at the door, July stopped and just looked at it. Miriam reached forward and grabbed the doorknob. July shut her eyes as she began to twist it and opened them once she heard the door swing open. The sight that greeted her was despondent and still. A fine layer of dust covered everything and the room's air was slightly stale.

"Is it?"

"It's still the same," Miriam finished for her. They quietly entered the room and July twirled around, trying to absorb every small detail. It was furnished similar to the rest of the house; the greens and blues slightly faded over the years. Everything was in its place. July looked from object to object and could envision her mom sitting at the vanity apply makeup while her dad stood in front of the mirror and fixed his tie. She didn't even realize tears were running down her face until Miriam passed her a tissue.

"Sorry, I didn't realize it was going to hit me like this," she replied as she wiped her eyes.

"It's okay dear," Miriam said consolingly. After July got herself under control, they slowly explored the room and July rummaged through everything. They approached the bookshelf last and July pulled out a random book; but it wasn't a book. As soon as she saw the cover she knew it was one of the photo albums.

Sitting on the unwrinkled bed, she flipped it open. She almost dropped the book when she found the first picture with Arnold in it but her shaky hands clutched onto it. She hastily flickered past it and her eyes skimmed over the other pictures. The last photo caught her attention and she focused on it. Her mom was standing with a woman that looked like her.

"That's her sister," Miriam said over her shoulder. The only difference between the two women was that one had dark brown eyes while the other didn't. A sense of déjà vucame over July and she tried to figure out why the women seemed so familiar to her but couldn't put her finger on it.

"What was her name?" July asked as she looked up.

"Caroline."

"Miriam, I need you to tell me everything," July said as she searched Miriam's face. Miriam let out a sigh and sat down next to her.

"I will only tell you what I know because that is all I know. I don't know everything and I'm afraid that you probably will never know everything," July nodded her head and waited. "Caroline and your mother were the best of siblings. Everything started when your mother met Ruben; your grandmother didn't approve at all. When Robin announced they were getting married, your grandmother disowned her and forbade Caroline to contact her. Of course she didn't listen and they talked to each other secretly. Your parents married each other anyways even though the disapproval from your grandmother weighed heavily on your mom. Caroline met your uncle Arthur around the same time. It broke your mother's heart when she couldn't get into the wedding because your grandmother wouldn't let them enter the church.

"Your parent's were having some trouble later on and your grandmother readily took her in when your mother ran to her. I don't know exactly all what happened but your mother was disowned once again when she became pregnant with you. You renewed your parent's love for each other and they stayed together.

"You had gone on vacation to Texas when you were attacked. Arnold threw the biggest fit when he heard about it. I asked him if we should get you and he said no."

"Wait, he told me that he tried to get me and that they wouldn't give me to him," July argued.

"No dear, Arnold didn't. They took your mother's body and had her buried in Shayfield Cemetery," Miriam said.

"What about my dad?"

"I don't know what they did with his body. I assumed that your other grandparents took him. Arnold was only focused on your mom. I guess it all makes sense now," Miriam trailed off, not sure what else to say.

"What was Caroline's last name? What are my grandparent's names?" the questions pouring from July's mouth as her mind raced.

"Caroline married Arthur so it became Gilroy. And your grandparents are Rosemary and Tom Covington. Your other grandparents were Clyde and Wilma Jones, but they died about two years ago," Miriam's face was sad as she answered the questions.

"Did they have any other kids?"

"No, Ruben was their only child. Caroline was your mother's only sister," she continued as she saw July open her mouth again. July's mouth closed and she mulled over everything.

"Thank you for answering my questions," she said after a bit.

"Your welcome dear. I should be going. Isaiah has soccer today," Miriam mumbled as she got up. July walked her to the front door and waved as she droved away. Well, she had got her answers, now she just wasn't too sure what to do next.

* * *

Erin flopped down onto the guest bed. She could barely hear her grandpa's snoring from the next room. She had already called and made sure that Megan and Rachel knew she was okay and her thoughts floated back to their conversation.

"_Erin! I thought you had died in the fire! Are you okay?" Rachel asked as her voice turned slightly hysterical._

"_I'm okay. I left before it happened," she answered, lying again._

"_So what happened? Why'd you leave?"_

"_I found Jay in bed with some girl."_

"_Oh Erin. I'm sorry. You should have just came over," Rachel said and Erin frowned at her almost chastising tone._

"_It was just a lot to take in and I left."_

"_Are you coming back?"_

"_Maybe," she replied. "I don't know yet. I think I'm going to stay out here for a while thought. Look, I got to go but let Megan know I'm alright."_

The rest of the conversation faded away, leaving her staring at the ceiling. She knew she should be tired. It was late into the night but the fact that her dad was going to be in the same state as her in a few hours set her on edge. She wasn't exactly sure how everything was going to go. Her grandparents had bought her falling down story. She unconsciously ran her finger over the healed scar. Her predication had been right and the scar was more visible than before.

She knew that he dad would be less inclined to hit her since they were around her grandparents. She was just really worried that her dad would make her go back and that was something that she couldn't and wouldn't do. That town had brought her nothing but pain and heartache and she wasn't about to go back; he'd have to drag her. Plus, she was 18 now, so he couldn't make her go. That thought made her feel a bit better but it didn't let her relax. She was going to have to ask her grandparents if she could stay with them and once she had their permission, her dad would be less likely to make her leave because that would make then suspicious.

Her thoughts drifted again and she found herself thinking about that girl that had helped her. July. It was a strange name but it fit the girl. She still hadn't asked about the picture and wasn't going to until her dad left. And if she had her way, she was going to ask her grandpa and not her grandma. Her grandpa would be more willing to answer her questions and she would feel more comfortable talking to him. Her gaze wondered over to the side table where he stuff was, the white business card standing out in the darkness of the room. She'd have to go once her dad was gone.

* * *

Light flooding on her face brought her out of her slumber and she groaned as the light persisted and pulled the blankets over her face.

"Time to get up. We'll be leaving to get your father soon," her grandma said. Erin peeked her eyes out from under the blankets to see her grandmother staring down at her.

"I'll be up in a second," Erin said and was rewarded with a frown from her grandmother.

"I expect you to be down for breakfast in a half an hour," she replied before walking out. Erin gave another groan before sitting up and rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Gather her things, she quickly took a shower and headed down stairs, the bottom of her jeans treaded on the ground as she walked. She entered the dining room and gave her grandpa a smile as she sat down.

"Morning," he greeted taking a sip of his coffee.

"Morning."

"You sleep okay?"

"Fine. I was wondering, would it be okay if I stayed with you guys for a while?" she asked.

"Of course! You can stay as long as you like. You know they have some great college out here," Tom said giving her hand a squeeze, his brown eyes twinkling.

"What time are we picking up dad?" she asked meekly.

"Around 11. You're not looking to forward to it are you?" he asked with that grandpa stare that made you spill everything.

"Not really. It's just been hard after mom… things have been different. I just wanted some time," she answered truthfully.

"Don't worry, I doubt that he'll stay for long. His business is too important to neglect for long."

Rose chose that moment to enter, carrying in their plates of food.

"Thanks grandma," Erin said as Rose set down her plate. She gave her a pleasant smile before setting down Tom's plate and giving him a peck on the cheek. Once she returned with her food, they ate and conversed. After breakfast was done, they left, knowing that traffic would be heavy.

With the car parked, they headed into the airport, maneuvering their way through the throng of people. They neared the terminals just as people began to pour out. It didn't take long for her to spot her dad and the knots in her stomach doubled. She warily followed after her grandparents, who were each giving her dad a hug. She finally stepped up and his eyes landed on her, their darkness making her quiver.

"Hello dear," he said with a tone that let her know she was in trouble.

* * *

So Erin's dad is here, let the drama begin! Don't forget to review! 


	10. Some Information

So sorry for the lateness. College has been extremely busy. I have finals next week. Hopefully I can get back on schedule and write more soon. I've kind of had writer's block on my stories and I've lost my muse since Scorching has been grounded off for a month. sigh. anywho, without any more delays, the next chapter.

* * *

With the car parked, they headed into the airport, maneuvering their way through the throng of people. They neared the terminals just as people began to pour out. It didn't take long for her to spot her dad and the knots in her stomach doubled. She warily followed after her grandparents, who were each giving her dad a hug. She finally stepped up and his eyes landed on her, their darkness making her quiver.

"Hello dear," he said with a tone that let her know she was in trouble.

"Hi dad," Erin said quietly as she gave him a hug. He crushed her against him and Erin held back a gasp from his bruising hold. When her ribs felt ready to give, he let her go. She quietly sucked in lungs full of air as her dad discarded her and began to talk to her grandparents. Her grandpa's touch startled her and she could see the worry glittering in his eyes.

"Erin, you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Well come on, you know your grandma hates airports," he said teasingly as he wrapped an arm around her.

The back seat of the car seemed to have shrunk in the time that it had been parked. As Erin got in, she could feel her dad's presence so close it almost suffocated her.

"Are you sure you don't want the front Art?" Rose asked as she sat down in the passenger seat.

"Yes, I'm going to sit back here with Erin," he replied giving Erin a chilling smile. Erin gulped and readjusted herself, trying to sit as far away as possible.

Her grandpa began to drive and she stared out the window, refusing to look at her dad. She almost jumped out of her skin when she felt the hand on her leg, right above her knee. Art let out a slight chuckle at her jump and continued on his conversation with Tom and Rose. His grip tightened and her leg began to protest under the pressure, his nails digging into the denim. Erin bit back the yelp of pain and closed her eyes as she concentrated.

An abrupt break slammed both of them forward and her dad released her as he used his hands to brace himself. A string of curses flowed out of Tom's mouth at the car that had cut in front of them. Erin could feel her heart pounding in her chest and she rubbed the spot her dad had been gripping. Looking out the front, she could see the yellow sports car that cut in front of them speed off. She sent out a silent thank you to them and watched as it disappeared down the highway.

* * *

July popped into the kitchen next door to find Jesse alone. She looked around for Amy but didn't see her.

"Hey Jess."

"Oh, hey JJ. What's up?" he asked as he picked up his PB&J and took a bite.

"Nothing much. Where's Amy? 'Cuz you know, you two are like attached at the hip."

"She went shopping with Mia. Something about a big sale, but I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention once she said shopping," he answered with a smirk that July returned before she grew serious.

"Jess, think you could help me out?" July asked as she chewed on her lip.

"Sure, whatcha need?"

"I need you to help me find some info on some people."

"On who exactly?" Jesse asked.

"On my family. You guys all know about me being adopted. Well, I went through my parents stuff and found out some things and I want to see what I can find on them," she answered truthfully and stared into Jesse's eyes, hoping he'd see how much she needed to do this.

"Alright, come on." July followed after him. His room was the same at it was before and she gingerly sat down on the chair next to the one Jesse sat down in. She waited until Jesse had flipped the computer on and turned to look at her.

"Where to start?" she mumbled to herself. "Try Caroline Gilroy." She watched as Jesse turned back to the computer and started typing. She waited as patiently as she could but time to seem to be dragging on.

"Alright," Jesse's voice startled her and she quickly looked at the screen. "Here's what we got. Caroline Gilroy. I got a marriage certificate to Arthur Gilroy. I also have a…" he trailed off, not sure how to tell her.

"What Jesse?"

"It's a death certificate. It's dated 3 years ago," he said quietly. July could feel the tears push at her eyes and the frustration that welled up in her.

"It was my aunt. Is there anything else?" she forced herself to ask.

"Uh… her name is on two birth certificates to… Kyle and Erin Gilroy. They'd be your cousins. I can look them up if you want to?" he asked trying to cheer her up.

"That would be great Jess." The room was quiet except the tapping of the keyboard.

"Kyle's a year older than you. Says here that he has a residence in Florida. Erin just turned 18 not to long ago. Uh, as far as I can tell she's still living with her dad," he said as he continued to read on.

"Where?"

"Uh, it's on the east coast but it's not going to help much."

"What? Why?" July asked confused.

"According to this article, the house burnt down over a week ago," Jesse said and turned to look at July. Her face was drawn but then it snapped up, hope still shinning in her eyes.

"But there aren't death certificates are there? So they could still be alive?" she asked trying not to get her hopes up too much. Jesse turned back to the computer, hoping he'd be able to tell her some good news.

"It says that Arthur was out of town and they're not sure about Erin thought." He paused, typing and clicking for a bit. "Ah, it was confirmed yesterday that Erin is okay. Apparently she's here."

"What do you mean here? You mean like as in LA here?"

"Yup. Her dad made a statement saying that her grandma called and said Erin was with them." Jess turned back to July and could see the tears welling in her eyes. July sat for a minute and let it all sink in. Her cousins were still alive; she had real family that was still alive. That didn't go to say that Vince and the rest of the team weren't family but to be able to find her real relatives…it would kind of put that last piece of the puzzle together. July wrapped her arms around Jess, hugging him tight.

"Thank you. Thank you," she mumbled over and over again. Jesse patted her back and waited until July let go.

"You're welcome, but we're not done yet. Let's see if I can find those grandparents. Now tell me their names," he instructed turning back to the computer.

"Rosemary and Tom Covington," she answered wiping the last tear from her eye.

"Alright, let's see what I can find," Jess said as his hands flew over the keyboard. "Okay I got an address. Pen, paper…" he mumbled as he looked around his mess. Finally he found them and scribbled down the address. "Here," he said passing her the paper. July took it, staring down at the address.

"Jess," she started looking up at him, "I can't tell you how much this means to me. Thank you." July hugged him again.

"No problem. So now what are you going to do?" he asked. July stared at the piece of paper, her mind racing on what she was going to do. She finally answered him quietly.

"I don't know Jess, I really don't know."

* * *

Erin held her tongue in check as he dad continued on about how good things were going. The rest of the ride home went smooth and now they were currently sitting on the outside porch having tea. Her grandmother kept giving her a frown as she replied to her dad in clipped tones and her grandpa just gave her a look like he knew something was up.

"So I told Erin it was perfectly fine if she stayed with us for a while," Tom said and Erin immediately tuned into the conversation. She watched as a muscle in her dad's cheek twitched and knew there'd be words later for her.

"Really. That's wonderful," Arthur replied giving her a smile that made her insides cringe. "But are you sure you want to take her? I wouldn't want to be burdening you," he said, playing the concerned parent down to the 't'.

"Oh it would be no trouble at all. She is my granddaughter after all and we haven't seen her in years. It will be good to have her around for a while," Tom replied, giving Erin's hand a squeeze.

"Yes Art, don't worry about it. I'm sure there's plenty around for her to amuse herself with," Rose cut in.

"Well, if your both sure then I suppose it's fine."

"So, how long do you plan on staying?" Rose asked.

"Till Tuesday. I've got some big business deal to do in New York so I'll be flying out then."

"Wonderful. That leaves us with something to do together tomorrow. Well, if you'll excuse us, Tom and I have a previous arrangement to go to. We shouldn't be long," Rose explained as she got up, pulling Tom with her. "We'd cancel but it such short notice and we wouldn't want to disappoint."

"Don't worry about it Rose. It'll give Erin and me some time to catch up. You two go on along. We'll see you later," he replied. Erin kissed her grandparents' good bye and they left leaving her and her dad alone. Erin immediately got up and scampered inside the house. She could feel her dad come after her and hear him shut the door.

"Good, I'd rather do this inside anyways," she heard him say.

* * *

Anyone wanna guess who's car cut in front of Erin? ;) 


	11. Taking a Stand

This is just a quick note to let you know that Erin's scene is a bit more dark than usual. There is physical violence/abuse in it and if it offends anyone I'm sorry. Like I said before, if anyone feels that the PG-13 rating on this is too low, let me know and I will raise it.

* * *

July sat, and sat, and sat some more, thinking about what to do. She wanted to find her family but at the same time she didn't. Of course she wanted to meet them simply because they were her family; but they also had abandoned her and left her on her own. But she really couldn't hold her cousins accountable since they couldn't have done anything, having been too young themselves.

Vince's feather light touch startled her and he laughed softly as she sat down on the couch next to her and wrapped an arm around her.

"So, what are you thinking about that has got you so far away in thought that you didn't even notice me come into the room?" he asked with a slight pout. She gave him a leisurely kiss before resting her head against his shoulder.

"About things," she answered simply. She spent a few minutes explaining what she had found out and what Miriam had told her. She hadn't told him yet because she wanted to figure out her own feelings first but now that she had told Vince, she felt better.

"So that's what's got you all distracted. I knew something was up," he said as he ran a hand through her hair.

"Really?"

"Yeah, you've been acting kind of off. You're actually quiet for once," he said and July smacked him playfully.

"So," she took a deep breath, "What do you think I should do?"

"They're your family. I'd at least meet your cousins. They had nothing to do with what happened to you. I'd be more cautious about meeting anyone else though."

"That's exactly what I was thinking," she said smiling at him.

"What can I say? I know you and we're two of a kind," he replied. They sat in comfortable silence for a while, each content on just being together.

"V?" July murmured a bit later. "Do you think we'll ever have a family?" She felt his hand still in her hair for a moment before continuing.

"Some day, I hope. When we're married and older," he said finally.

"Older? But you're already old right now," she teased and Vince pushed her over, pinning her down on the couch.

"I'll show you old," he said with a wink.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"Forever?" she asked, timidly, the teasing now gone. Vince stared into her eyes and could see her fear of being abandoned again and felt his heart tug at the though of ever leaving her.

"Forever," he replied, kissing her.

* * *

Erin was more than aware of the severity of the situation. The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end, signaling the known danger. She felt her body give the smallest of tremors and steeled herself. She needed to stand strong.

"Now my dearest daughter," Art said in a sickly sweet voice as he walked towards her. "You wouldn't have any clue as to who burned the house down do you?" he asked as his hand reached out and played with her hair.

"I have no clue," she answered back in a calm voice even though she could feel her heart beating rapidly in her chest.

"Wrong answer," he said and tugged her hair, snapping her head to the left. "Now I want you to tell me the truth. Who burned down the house?" he asked staring her straight in the eyes. Erin debated on what to say but knew that he wouldn't give up till he got the truth.

"I did," she said quietly.

"Would you like to say that a bit louder?"

"I did," she repeated her gaze unflinching. She only had a moment to brace herself before he began hitting her, making his fury know.

"You piece of shit. I raised you, I gave you a roof over your head, clothes on your back, food in your stomach and this is the way you repay me by burning down my house? You selfish little brat," he finished his tirade with a slap to her face, the crack resonating in the otherwise silent room.

Erin could taste the metallic copper of blood in her mouth and stared up at him with pure hatred. She did the most disrespectful thing she could think of at the moment and spit the mouthful of blood on him. In an instant she knew it was probably the stupidest thing to do that and the pain that found its way on her body under his abuse proved that. She fell back against the wall and slumped to the floor, her body and spirit broken for the moment. Her dad stood over her, a mix of disgust and shame filling his eyes at the same time. Who knew what was going through his head.

"Get yourself clean up," he commanded, his voice leaving no room for argument. Erin shakily made it to her feet and trotted up the stairs as fast as she could. She entered her room for the moment and locked the door behind her, her body threatening to collapse. She quickly entered the attached bathroom, stripped and got into the shower, turning it on as hot as she could stand.

She stood beneath the spray, letting it wash away the blood from her face and sooth the aches and bruises she knew were already forming. Her legs felt like they couldn't support her anymore and she leaned against the wall, sliding to the floor. Her tears soon intermingled with the water and the shower muffled her sobs. Rocking back and forth, she cried; she cried until there was nothing left, until her lungs were raw from her sobs and her eyes were bloodshot. She cried over what was happening; she cried over all the losses in her life. She saw her heart shrinking before her eyes and felt herself become a little colder, a little blacker, inside.

Finally, something within her snapped. Why was she allowing him to make her feel inferior? Why did she allow him to get away with this and make her feel as if she were the one that was wrong? The indignation over the situation finally met it breaking point and her anger burned hot. She stood up with determination, shutting off the water and getting out. Toweling off herself, she quickly got dressed and thundered down the stairs.

She moved into the living room with purpose, determined not to cower or back down. Her righteousness making her stand tall. Her dad was unperturbed, offering only a raised eyebrow.

"It's over," she stated.

"Excuse me."

"It's over. You will never lay a hand on me again. As of right now, it's over. I am done taking your crap and I am done being your punching bag. You are not my father. I can't see what my mother ever saw in you and," she never got to finish her sentence before her father was up, grabbing her by the throat and slamming her into the wall.

"What your mother and I had is none of your business. I loved her and that is all that mattered. You will not talk to me like that again and disrespect me. Do you hear me?" he growled out, getting into her face. Instead of answering, Erin went on instinct and head butted him. Arthur groaned in pain, as did Erin. _Man, that looked so much easier in the movies,_ she thought but she had managed to dislodge him and ran a hand down her throat.

"That's it. I'm done being nice," he said looking up at her.

"Nice? Is this what you call nice? Because I find it abusive and sadistic," she retorted. Arthur charged at her and Erin ducked out of the way, determined to come out on top. She managed to duck his first punch and respond with one of her own, hitting him in the face.

She replayed any fighting movies in her head and listened to her instincts as she continued to fight. When he managed to land a good punch and she felt a bit wobbly, she did the last resort move and kneed him in the groin. Art bellowed, falling to his knees as tears gathered in his eyes. Remembering a combination from a movie, she kicked him in the stomach and as he bent forward, she grabbed his head and brought her knee up at the same time. His nose made an audible crunch and he flopped onto his back, the blood free flowing.

Erin took deep breaths, trying to calm herself down. She knew she should feel bad for what she had just done, but she couldn't. This man, no oppressor, had abused her physically and mentally for months and he got what he deserved. Erin leaned against the wall and wiped her own blood from her lips, tears gathering in her eyes as she stared down at her father. This man was supposed to be her hero, her friend, her dad, and he had been anything but. She held a shaking hand against her mouth as the front door opened.

"Hello? We're home," her grandpa called out as they entered. Erin heard their collective gasps of shock as they entered the living room.

"Oh my god, what happened?" Tom asked as Rose went over to Arthur, trying to rouse him. Erin couldn't find the words to explain what happened and her grandpa looked at her bewildered as she stared helplessly at him. A groan from across the room attracted their attention and they both looked over to see Arthur beginning to sit up.

"What happened?" Rose questioned. Erin quickly tried to form the words but her dad beat her to it.

"She hit me. I went to talk to her and she hit me. I naturally tried to defend myself without hurting her and she just attacked me," he wheezed out, one hand trying to stanch the flow of blood as the other cupped himself. Her grandmother turned enraged eyes on her as her grandpa looked at her in dismay.

"He's lying. I didn't hit him first. He hit me. Look," Erin said as she lifted up her shirt and showed the forming bruises on her body. A sharp intake of breath from her grandpa was the only reaction she got.

"Why would he hit you first? I think the only person here who is lying is you. I want you out of my house now. I will not tolerate this behavior nor will I condone it. Go get your stuff and get out," Rose ordered.

"Please grandpa, you have to believe me," she pleaded, staring into his eyes. Her grandpa quickly looked away, unsure of who to believe or what to say. Erin could see the victorious gleam in her father's eyes and knew that no mattered what she said they weren't going to believe her. With nothing else to do, she turned and went up to gather her stuff, tears coursing down her face.

Numbly, she packed her things, not really feeling anything at all. She stared absently around the room, checking to see if she had everything. With jerky movements, she zipped up her duffle bag, the sense of déjà vu was not lost on her. She exited the room and quietly walked down the stairs. No one was in the living room to see her leave and she opened the front door, hesitating to walk out. She looked over one last time and was surprised to see her grandpa standing there, looking older than ever.

"I'm sorry for anything I've ever done wrong. But what happened today, I can't be sorry for that. It had been going on for too long and I couldn't keep letting him hit me. I'm sorry," she said, her voice barely above a whispered as she stared at the doorknob in her hands. When Tom didn't say anything, she felt her anger at her father grow that much more. Not only had he made Kyle leave, now she had lost her grandparents. With strength she didn't know she had, she forced herself to walk out the door and close it behind her. Now she was truly on her own.

* * *

Thank you for all the reviews, I'm glad you guys are liking the fic. And for all of those who are reading and have yet to review, please do, don't be afraid. I'mhappy for any feedback of any kind. 


	12. Time to do Some Damage

Rocking back and forth. The motion was soothing. The wetness from her tears scorched her flush cheeks and she bit her lip in attempts to stop the sob from breaking the quietness of the room. The hotel carpet was rough against her feet and the bedspread scratched her back as she brushed against it. Everything was too harsh; everything was too bright.

The fading light of day poured in from the window and life continued out on the street, the voices drifting into the room, oblivious to the despair she was in. Life continued on as her own broke before her. Her body ached from the combined force of the bruises and sobs. Her own drying blood was sticky on her body and she knew she should take a shower but it was as if she had lost control of her body and was unable to render it to move.

She had thrown herself in her car and driven to the closest hotel. The only good thing about LA was that no one asked too many questions. Cleaning herself up to look marginally presentable, she checked out a room and then flown to it, only stopping to grab her stuff out of her car. She had kept herself together up until then but behind the protection of the walls, she had fallen; fallen so far apart that she didn't know if she could put herself together.

The ache from the loss of her grandparents, especially her grandpa, hit her like a bunch of bricks in the chest. The looks of shock and disgrace on their faces replayed in her mind and she flinched, still feeling their effects. Then the image of Jay in bed with another girl added to the mix and it was just too much._ Time to do some damage._

Erin scooted over to her bag, rummaging through the bag. She finally pulled out a skirt and a very skimpy top that would cover up her bruises but show enough skin to be effective. She quickly took a shower and got dressed, using some of her makeup to cover up any bruises that were still showing. She ran her fingers through her hair, leaving it wild. She heavily lined her eyes in charcoal kohl and put some hoop earring in.

Standing back, she looked at her reflection. She didn't even know the person she was seeing. They looked older, colder, than she remembered herself being. Grabbing her ID, door card, and some cash, she left the hotel room and hailed a cab.

* * *

Erin directed the cab towards the busier side of town and managed to find a club that looked pretty active and had no trouble getting in. She flirted her way into getting a few guys to buy her drinks, and by her fourth drink, she was relatively numb. _So this is why dad drinks,_ she thought as she finished her latest drink, the alcohol burning as it went down but giving her a sense of euphoria.

She shimmied her way out onto the dance floor and did her best to dance but the effects of the alcohol on her empty stomach were against her, causing her to stumble. She landed against a chest, clutching on to the person's arms to stop her from face planting into the floor.

"Sorry," she slurred as she looked up at the man, his dark eyes running over her form. She felt a shiver run down her body under his penetrating gaze. She needed to get away from him, quick.

"It's alright sweetheart. You look a little tipsy. Maybe you should come sit with me for a while. I can get us into a private booth or something," the man said, his fingers caressing her arms as he held her.

"No thank you," Erin managed to say, sobering a bit.

"Oh come on baby, you know you want to," he said as he continued to pull on her. Erin struggled against his grip the best she could but couldn't pull herself free. _Oh god, what am I going to do?_ Erin began to panic and tried in all earnest as the man continued to run his hands over her and pull her towards the back.

"Oh sweetie, there you are. I was looking for you," another man said as he walked up to them. Erin looked up to suddenly finding her mouth dry as she stared into his hazel eyes. His brown hair was slicked back and a silver necklace adorned his neck. He was chewing on a toothpick and he winked at her, silently telling her to play along.

"Hey honey," she slurred, still trying to get away from the guy holding her. She didn't know who this other guy was but there was something in his eyes that told her she could trust him.

"She with you?" the first guy asked gruffly.

"Yeah. Now take your hands off my girl."

Erin suddenly found herself free from the man's grip and felt herself crashing towards the floor. Her rescuer caught her without any effort and held her against him as the other man walked off.

"Thank you," Erin mumbled, holding onto him. "I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't shown up."

"No problem," he said while he helped her stand up, his hands resting on her hips. "The name's Leon."

"Erin."

"It's not safe being out here by yourself. Guys like that will take advantage so be careful," he said as he led her over to a bench and helped her sit down.

"What about you?" she asked letting go of his arm.

"I'm different. I was taught better than that."

"That's nice to know," she slurred slightly. Erin suddenly felt sleepy and leaned against him as her eyes began to droop.

"Hey, looks like you're falling asleep on me. Is there anyone around here you're with?" Leon asked shaking her lightly to get her attention.

"Huh? No, I'm not here with anyone. Just me, myself, and I," she answered, giggling softly before falling silent and starting to nod off.

"Hey, wake up there. You have to help me get you home," he said shaking her again.

"Not home, don't have a home. Was sent away. All alone," she mumbled sadly. "He told lies. She told me to leave. So disappointed. He hurt me," she continued to ramble on and Leon sat confused, trying to make sense of her fragmented sentences.

"Where are you staying then?"

"Hotel. 21st street. Econo Lodge," she forced out, her brain having a hard time remembering. Now that the information was out, she fell back against him, her energy depleted for the moment.

Leon debated on what to do. The chick was obviously drunk and she wasn't here with anyone, so there was no way she was going to make it anywhere on her own; but she wasn't his responsibility. Looking up, he saw the guy from earlier staring at the dozing girl in his arms and the look he was giving her made up his mind: he was taking her back to her hotel.

He gathered her up in his arms and pushed towards the exit. The cool night air seems to rouse her a bit and she began to start walking a bit, stumbling every once in a while. He finally directed them towards his car and settled her in. Something nagged at the back of her mind as she saw his car but her mind was fuzzy and she couldn't figure out what it was trying to tell her.

"Wrong side, I can't drive," she said, giggling at the idea. "No driving for this girl."

"It's a foreign car. Steering wheel's on the other side," Leon explained, pointed towards the steering wheel. She looked at it as if it were the most bizarre thing she had ever seen. He smiled at the confused pout she wore, her features set in a puzzled expression.

"Whatever," she said before resting against the headrest and closing her eyes. Leon quickly got in the other side and started up the car. He headed towards her hotel and parked in their lot about 10 minutes later.

Turning off the car, he looked over at her; she was curled up in the seat, her auburn hair fanned around her. Quietly, he got and then opened her door. He picked her up and then realized his dilemma: he had no clue which room she was in.

"Hey, Erin, wake up for a second," Leon whispered, setting her down on the bonnet for a second as he nudged her awake.

"Five more minutes," she muttered and snuggled closer to him, seeking out his warmth.

"In a second. I need to know what room you're in and your key," he holding her face up with his hand.

"Room 34," she said struggling to relay the information.

"Key?" he requested. He felt his eyes widen as her hand dipped into her shirt. It stayed there for a second before pulling out the plastic card key and giving it to him. She looked up to see his slightly shocked expression and smirked at him.

"No pockets," she explained before her eyelids shut again. "You know, you smell good," she commented, leaning against him, her speech still somewhat slurred. Leon chuckled and picked her back up.

He found the room and opened it, the door shutting behind him. He looked around the barely touched room and settled her on the made bed. He pulled off her shoes and then left to the bathroom, returning with a glass of water. He set it on the stand next to the bed and then stared down at the girl. She looked young, just about 18 or so. A ping of familiarity ran through him but he brushed it off. It wasn't like he was going to see her again.

Sure that he had done all he needed to do, Leon turned and began to open the door. A small whimper caught his attention and he looked around, trying to find the source. He looked down at Erin to find her trembling and tears were beginning to leak out from underneath her eyelids.

"No, please don't," she mumbled, her voice pleading as her body began to jerk. Leon dashed over to her and began to shake her awake.

"Hey, wake up. Wake up," he called again and Erin's eyes snapped open, looking around frightened. "You were having a nightmare."

_No I wasn't_, the words silently sounded in her head. The image of her father ready to strike her surfaced in her mind just as Leon raised a hand and she flinched away. Leon halted his hand and then slowly lowered it towards her face and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

"You okay?" he asked, his eyes searching hers to find out what had scared her.

"I'm fine," she replied as shivers began to rack her body. Leon helped settle her underneath the blankets. Leon pulled the comforter up to her chin and waited till she looked like she was asleep before turning back towards the door.

"No, stay, you smell good."

Leon turned at the slurred speech to see Erin with one eye open. He took a deep breath and figured he wasn't going to be able to leave till she was sober. He'd have enough experience dealing with drunken people to know that it could get very ugly and he rather keep her content than stir up trouble.

"Alright. I'll stay," he said pulling over a chair and sitting it next to the bed.

Keeping one eye open, Erin tried to grab for his hand and after several attempt she finally grabbed it.

"There's room in comfy bed," she said stringing the words together. With what little strength she had, she pulled on him. "Chairs aren't comfy."

Leon sat down on the bed and then reclined. Erin instantly latched onto him and took a deep breath.

"Night," she mumbled.

"Night," Leon whispered, promising himself he'd leave as soon as she fell completely asleep.

* * *

Somewhere between watching Erin and the clock, Leon had dozed off. He yawned and stretched out to find his movement restricted. He glanced down to see that Erin still had a grip on him and was slowly coming out of her own slumber.

Erin shook her head and instantly regretted the movement. She closed her eyes and tried to stop the pain that was thundering behind her eyes.

"No sudden movements would be good," Leon commented at her groan of pain. Erin's eyes snapped open and locked onto him. In a moment of blind panic she almost pushed him away when the events of last night washed over her and she subtly let go of him and tried to sit up. The change of equilibrium caused her to sway a bit and Leon reached for her.

"I'd be careful. I don't know how much you had to drink but I'd be careful not to get up soon, you might make yourself sick."

"I don't feel sick. Just thirsty and big headache," she replied holding one hand to her head.

"Here." Leon reached over and handed her the glass of water.

"Thanks," she said as she took the glass and sipped at it, the liquid soothing her dry throat. "Um, thanks, for last night I mean. That guy really scared me and I don't think I'd be doing so good if you hadn't shown up or taken care of me, so thanks," she rushed out in one breath, blushing under his scrutiny.

"You're welcome," her answered back. An awkward silence permeated the room and Erin stared down at her glass not sure what else to say or do.

"Shower," she blurted out, her eyes widening with the way that it could be interpreted.

"What?" Leon asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm going to go take a shower," she clarified. "Then I'll take you to breakfast, you know, as a thank you."

"Sure, breakfast sounds good," he replied, giving her a smile.

Erin slowly got out of the bed, wary of her movements. She felt Leon's eyes on her as she grabbed a change of clothes and her other toiletries. She let out a breath of relief as soon as the bathroom door closed behind her. The after taste of alcohol in her mouth made her run for her toothbrush and scrub her mouth. She then shed her clothes and got into the shower.

Confusion over the situation ran through her and she felt exhausted. What the heck was she doing? She had some strange man in her hotel room and now she was going to take him out to breakfast. True, she owed it to him since he'd taken care of her and whatnot. She remembered the other man from last night and shivered when his leer reappeared in her mind.

This man, Leon, was different though. He almost reminded her of Jay… She'd have to be careful. Take him out to breakfast and then that was it. No dates, no exchanging phone numbers; nothing. There was no way she was going to allow herself to be sucked into a relationship again and not with someone that so resembled her last mistake. Leon was laid back and mellow; everything that Jay had been.

_But he's different, isn't he?_ her mind argued. Erin almost growl in frustration and vowed that breakfast was all it was going to be, just a thank you breakfast and then drop him like a rock. _But why, oh why, do I have a feeling it wasn't going to be that way?_

_

* * *

_

Once again, sorry about the lateness. My stories just don't want to write themselves. Please don't forget to review and let me know what you think!


	13. Confession

Okay, sorry for the lateness. I know I said I'd get this out sooner but some stuff came up and I couldn't find time to write. So very sorry, but here it is finally.

* * *

Leon lookedup to see the bathroom door open with a burst of steam. Erin came out a second later, rubbing a towel through her hair. 

"Hey," he said and then shot out of the bed, rushing over to her side. "What happened?" he asked as he took in the few bruises on her arms and the one peeking out from beneath her shirt. Now that he looked closer, he could see faint marks on her neck.

"Nothing," she snapped at him as she put her sweater and zipped it up.

"Aw, come on, that isn't nothing," he said trying to look her in the face but she stared down at the ground. Instead of answered him, she ignored him and finished getting read.

"Let's go," she ordered a couple minutes later, holding open the hotel door for him.

Leon exited out the door without saying a word. He heard her close the door and felt her catch up to him. He flowed her blindly, not ever asking where they were going. There was a story behind the bruises, now it was just a matter of figuring it out.

* * *

Not wanting to venture too far from the hotel, Erin had picked a diner across the street. They entered, finding the air warm inside, the spinning fans doing nothing more than move the stifling air around. It was around 11, the sun shined in through the window. They sat down in a booth and a waitress came over to them. 

"Well ain't you two just a cute couple," the waitress admired, her voice carrying a bit of a southern drawl. Erin fidgeted in her seat as Leon sat across from her, chewing on a toothpick, amusement showing through his smile.

"Uh, we're not together," Erin corrected her, a blush forming.

"Well that's a shame, ya'll look good together. Here the menus, I'll be back in a bit to get your order."

Erin nodded and stared at the menu, her cheeks still red. She heard Leon chuckle and silently cursed him, resisting the need to kick him underneath the table and busied herself looking at the different dishes.

The waitress came back a few minutes later, took their order and left again. Erin looked up to see Leon staring out the window. She felt bad at the way she had snapped at him but she didn't know him, there was no way she was telling him what happened.

"So you new around here?" Leon asked tentatively, finally breaking the silence.

"Kind of. I use to live here but then moved and now I'm back sort of," she answered, keeping her tone light.

"So you're living here sort of," he repeated with a quirked eyebrow.

"Well, I was staying with my grandparents but I kind of got kicked out, so now I'm staying in that hotel for the moment."

"What did you get kicked out for?" he asked and regretted it as soon as he saw her demeanor clam up.

"It's complicated," she replied, hoping he wouldn't push the subject and let out a sigh of relief when he didn't.

"You can't just live in that hotel forever you know," Leon said after a moment.

"I know. I'll figure it out. And no, I don't need your help," she said, saying the last part defensively.

Leon held his hands up in surrender and Erin let out a sigh and apologized.

"Didn't mean to snap, it's just everyone always wants to help," she sighed, grabbing her cup of water and twirling the ice with the straw.

"I know what you mean. After my mom left, everyone was always trying to help and it just made things worse," he said watching her carefully for a reaction. The straw instantly stopped moving and she finally looked up at him.

"You're mom left?"

"Yeah, when I was 16. It was 'cause of my old man. Use to beat up on her and finally she couldn't take it anymore and left."

"Sorry," she said realizing there was more to Leon than she thought. Her heart leaped at the idea that they probably had many things in common but she quickly stomped it down. _Remember, this is just breakfast, nothing else._

"I'm over it, well, as much as I'm going to be. So where you going to stay then?" Leon asked changing the subject.

"Here you two go," the waitress interrupted as she set down their plates of food, saving Erin from answering Leon. The smell of bacon wafted to her noise and she realized just how hungry she was. She put some ketchup on her hash browns and scrambled eggs and then dug in.

"Damn girl, slow down there. Heck, you could probably give V a run for his money at that rate," Leon exclaimed a few minutes later, his hazel eyes laughing at her. Erin chewing slowed down and then swallowed, a faint blush spotting her cheeks.

"Sorry, I didn't realize how hungry I was," she said quietly as she picked at her food.

"Hey, at least you're not afraid to eat in public or in front of a guy. I can't tell you how much it bugs me when chicks are like that," he replied and Erin found herself blushing again from his compliment.

They continued eating on in silence and it wasn't broken until the waitress came back to pick up their plates and drop off the bill. They both reached for it at the same time, their hands colliding. Erin scolded her body as a tingle ran up her arm from where they had touched.

"I got it. Remember, I was taking you out as a thank you," she reminded him as she reached for the bill. He caught her hand and held it as the tingles started again.

"I know, but a true gentlemen never makes the women pay," he said grabbing the bill with his other hand. He let go of her hand as she scowled at him.

"At least let me pay for me," she suggested.

"No," was his simple answer. She watched as he pulled out his wallet and placed some money on top of the bill. Erin tried to be mad, she really did, but when he looked up and flashed her a smile, she felt her anger melt.

They both got up without saying anything and walked back to her hotel room in silence. They stopped outside her door, Erin's hands playing with her keys.

"Thanks again. Last night could have gotten really ugly and it was pretty stupid on my part, so thanks for looking out," she said, staring down at her hands.

"No problem," he replied, playing with his own set of keys. "Guess I'll see you around?" he hinted, giving her another one of his smiles.

"Maybe," she said before opening her door and slipping inside. She rested against the closed door and took a deep breath. If she would have stared into those eyes any longer, or looked at the smile, she would have caved.

The sudden knocking on the door startled her and she jumped around, opening the door.

"Leon?" she said in confusion.

"Yeah, um, I kind of left my cell phone on the night stand," he answered, looking a bit sheepish. Erin turned and found it sitting next to the lamp. She retrieved it and held it out to him.

"Thanks," he said, his fingers brushing her as he grabbed it. "So, here's my number incase you decided you want to go out again. Just call me and I'll hang with you. Or you know, if you ever just want to hang out." He offered her the slip of paper in his hand. Erin slowly reached out and took it even though her mind protested at the idea. A sly grin came to his face.

"What?"

"If you still want to make it up to me, you'll let me take you out tonight. You can buy me a drink," he suggested. Erin found herself nodding in agreement; it was like she had lost complete control of her body.

"Sure, see ya at 8?" her mouth said.

"Sounds good, see ya then," he replied and began walking out towards the parking lot.

Erin closed the door and rested her forehead against it. She slipped the paper in her pocket. _Why did I agree to let him take me out?_ She thought back on those hazel eyes and smile, making her insides turn to mush. This was not good, not good at all. A few quiet seconds went by before a knock sounded on the door again and she opened it.

"What did you forget this time?" she started to ask but the question died in her throat as she saw who was on the other side. It wasn't Leon. A shiny badge and police uniform greeted her and she looked up. A grin broke out on her face as she launched her self at the person.

"Uncle Ray!" she cried, her arms wrapping around his neck, his arms wrapping around her in paternal protection. She let him go and watched as he took off his sunglasses, his eyes were solemn.

"We need to talk," he said, his tone even, not giving away any emotion but she could see the mix of happiness and confusion within the depths of his brown eyes.

"Okay," she replied in a small voice as she stepped aside and let him in. She closed the door and sat on the bed as he looked around. He was still the same Uncle Ray. His hair color was the exact same auburn color as hers. His uniform fit his lean build and he stood about half a foot taller than her. Ray turned towards her, his normally smiling face looking old despite his youngness.

"Something wrong?" she asked. He let out a sigh before grabbing one of the chairs in the room and setting it down in front of her and sitting down.

"I talked to your grandma," he said quietly. Erin's face fell and she closed her eyes, trying to push back the tears she knew were coming.

"It's not true," she croaked out.

"I never said it was. Why don't you tell me what happened?" he asked, his eyes staring at her. Erin let out a small sob before the whole story exploded from her lips. By the end, her uncle sat down next to her, cradling her, as her salty tears fell. He rubbed her back as she continued to cry, her tears finally letting up after a few more minutes. If felt so wonderful to finally be talking to someone about it. Her only fear was that he wouldn't believe her the same way her grandparents hadn't.

"Erin, could you please take off your sweater?" he asked, his voice wavering slightly. Erin slowly pushed her self up and unzipped her sweater. She pulled it off and closed her eyes as she felt him exam her exposed skin.

"The scars?" he questioned as his eyes spotted the various ones on her body.

"From him," she whispered.

"Even the one on your lip?"

"It was the very first one I ever got from him," she answered with a bitter laugh. He stared at her, his eyes continuing to look down at the bruises on her.

"You don't believe me, do you?" she asked, tears filling her eyes.

"No Erin, I do. It's my brother, I know what he's capable of," he answered and Erin stared at him before completely breaking down again.

"Grandma and Grandpa, they don't He told them I hit him first and they believed him. Why did they believe him? It hurt so bad. I was all alone. I don't want to be here anymore, it's all my fault," she cried.

"No Erin, don't think that way. They were just confused. But Erin you need to understand, you did nothing wrong. You hear me? Nothing. This is not your fault," he stressed as he stared into her face.

"Then why do I feel this way?"

"Because…" he faltered, unsure of what to say. He'd dealt with this situation before but now it hit too close to home. None of his police training could have prepared him for his. "Because he probably always put the blame on you and you see it as your actions causing this when it's not. Erin, people make mistakes, it's natural, but what he did, what he's doing, is not. So I need you to listen to me when I say it's not your fault okay?" His gave unwavering as he continued to stare at her.

"I'll try," she promised, looking down at the floor. Ray let out a deep sigh, his hand rubbing circles on her back.

"How'd you feel about staying with me? I know Fiona would love to have you. And Olivia has been asking about you lately. So what do you say?

"Sure. I'd really like that. I was going to call you later, but you found me first," she answered him and stood up, starting to pack her things. "So how did you find me anyways?"

"Erin, cop here," he said polishing off his badge. Erin laughed at him while she picked up her things.

"I think that's it," Erin said as she zipped up the last bag.

"That was your red car in the parking lot, wasn't it?" Ray asked and Erin nodded. "Kyle did a good job," he commented as he picked up her bags.

"Wait, you knew?"

"Where do you think he got the custom parts from?" Ray lifted an eyebrow at her.

"I should've known," she said as she put back on her sweater.

"I'll take the bags to the car while you check out." Erin gave him her keys and then he disappeared out the door.

Erin looked around the hotel room, making sure she hadn't forgotten anything and then headed out to the main office. She turned in her key and strode back out to her car. It was strange to see the squad car parked next to her and she could feel a couple sets of eyes on her.

"Man, you really draw attention," she commented, taking back her keys.

"What can I say, I'm an attractive guy," he shot back and smile when she laughed.

"Sure. I guess I'll just be following you then," Erin said and got into her car. Ray got into his squad car and Erin followed him to his house. Ray's house was on the oceanfront, his property extending down to the shore. Their house was like a little alcove among the green foliage. The houses were spread far apart from each other; the next house was about a half a mile away.

Erin pulled into his driveway and got out, bringing her bags with her. She took a deep breath of the ocean air, the smell comforting her. Ray pulling her bags from her hands brought her out of her daze and she followed him inside the house.

"Honey, what are you doing home?" Fiona said as he stepped through the door.

"I brought a little surprise," was he answer as he stepped aside, revealing Erin.

"Oh Erin!" Fiona exclaimed as she wrapped her up in a warm hug. Fiona was about as tall as her, with blonde hair and dark blue eyes. She was one of the nicest persons Erin knew and she returned the hug with equal favor.

"It's good to see you," Erin replied and let her. Erin froze when she became aware of the person standing behind Fiona. Her chest felt restricted and her palm began to sweat.

"Erin, good to see you," her dad said, a white bandage over his nose and the area under his eyes were purple. Ray immediately stepped in front of Erin and squared off with his brother.

"Art, I think it would be best of you left," he said while Fiona stared in him in confusion.

"I don't think so baby brother. My daughter and I still have a few things to settle."

"No you don't. Now please leave my home or I make you," he said as he felt Erin tremble slightly behind him.

"Fine, I'll leave. But I will talk to my daughter sooner or later," Art threatened before storming out the door. Erin jumped as he slammed the door behind him.

"You okay?" Ray asked turning around.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she replied just as a small body attacked her.

"Erin!" Olivia screamed as she latched herself to her. Erin smiled down at the brown head and picked her up, her nerves settling.

"Hey Olive," Erin greeted as blue eyes stared into hers.

"I missed you. You shouldn't go away anymore," Olivia said with a stern demeanor and crossed her arms. Erin couldn't help but smile at her seriousness.

"Erin's going to be staying with us for a little while honey," Ray told her.

"Yay! Can Erin come to school with me one day?" Olivia asked.

"We'll see sweetie, now go finish working on your homework," Fiona said. Erin let Olivia down and watched as she walk down the hall and went into her room.

"I'm going to go put your stuff in the guest room and then we'll all talk," Ray said, looking pointedly at Fiona and then trailed after Olivia.

"Here, let me take your sweater, you have to be warm in it," Fiona said making a grab for it but Erin jumped back.

"No! I'm fine."

"Alright," Fiona said eyeing her warily. "Come on in the kitchen and I'll get you something to drink."

Erin followed after her into the kitchen and sat herself down on one of the stools at the counter.

"Ice tea?"

"That'd be fine," Erin said automatically and sipped at the cup Fiona passed her.

"Hungry?"

"No, I just ate, but thanks."

Ray entered the kitchen and sat down at the counter next to Erin.

"Are you going to explain why you were so rude to your brother?" Fiona snapped.

"Is it alright if I tell Fiona?" Ray whispered to Erin. She looked up at him and then back at the counter.

"Yeah," she answered quietly. Fiona was going to find out one way or another and it'd be better if she knew, things would probably make more sense. Plus, Erin was tired of sneaking around, it made her feel dirty.

She sat quietly as Ray explained everything. Erin could practically feel the pity rolling off of Fiona and it bugged her but she didn't say anything. The three of them sat in silence once Ray finished talking.

"Is that why you didn't want me to take your sweater?" Fiona asked and Erin nodded. "Sorry I snapped at you honey," she said to Ray, who just nodded understandingly at her. "Can I, would you show me?" Fiona asked Erin.

Erin looked up at her unsure. She bit her lip as she zipped off her sweater and let Ray help her pull it off.

"Oh my god," Fiona murmured coming over to Erin's side. "Some one these have reopened."

"I think when I picked up Olivia."

"Why don't you come into the bathroom and I'll clean them up," Fiona suggested. Erin reluctantly agreed.

"Erin, I have to ask you something first," Ray called after her.

"What?"

"Do you want to press charges against your dad? You'd have to go to court and testify and do all the paper work, and I'll understand if you don't want to, I hope you do, but it's up to you."

"I don't want to. I don't want anyone to know. I just want it to go away and pretend it didn't happen," she answered, tears gathering in her eyes.

"I'll make sure that he doesn't stays away from you, but I won't be able to protect you 24/7, so you're going to have to be careful until he leaves," he said putting a hand on her shoulder and noticing her reflexive flinch.

"I know. Thank you. I don't…just, thank you," Erin replied, giving his hand a squeeze before walking into the bathroom. Ray stared after her, a new resolve to keep Erin safe growing.

* * *

Erin kept her eyes closed and tried to think of other things as Fiona cleaned her cuts with disinfectant. A light blush colored her cheeks as she stood in her bra in front of Fiona. 

"Are you okay?" Fiona asked and Erin's eyes snapped open.

"I'm fine, just hurts."

"I'm sorry. Okay, I'm done," she stated and put things away as Erin dressed again.

"Are you guys about done in there?" Ray asked through the door.

"Yeah, we're coming out," Fiona said as she opened the door.

"Well, I've got to get back to work. Are you going to be okay here?" he asked Erin.

"I'll be okay," she answered, wrapping her arms around herself. "I'm going to go change." Erin walked passed them, down the hall, and into the guest room. She opened the window and laid down on the bed as she listened to the surf crash. The sound soothed her, and she closed her eyes trying to image being in her willow tree. Slowly, as wave after wave broke, she was lulled to sleep.

* * *

Didn't you just love the waitress? So review and let me know what ya thought about the chapter. 


	14. Tell me Everything

All right, I want to give my deepest apologies for my lack of updating. As some of you have read, I was enjoying my summer and suffering from writer's block. I will try to write more but I don't want to promise anything. I'd rather take longer to get the chapter right then rush and put out something that's not up to par. So my deepest apologies again and biggest thanks to those of you that read and review. I'm glad that this story is entertaining and that so many of you like it. Okay, speech over now, here's the chapter.

* * *

A tapping at the door stirred Erin out of her slumber and her surroundings slowly came swimming into focus. Her body ached and she cursed herself for not taking something before she had slept. 

"Erin?" Fiona called from the other side of the door. Erin got up with a groan, her battered body protesting at the movements.

"Yeah?" she called out as she walked towards the door and opened it. Fiona stood with a curious expression on her face.

"Oh, sorry," she offered contritely. "I didn't mean to wake you, but I'm just about done with dinner and was wondering if you wanted to eat."

"Yeah. Um, would it be all right if I made a phone call first?" Erin fidgeted on her feet.

"Sure honey, you're more than welcomed to use the phone. We'll be waiting in the kitchen for you." Fiona gave her a smile before departing down the hall.

Erin closed the door and flipped on the lights, blinking against their brightness. When she could see again, she saw that the clock on the nightstand read six o'clock. She dug into her pocket and pulled out Leon's phone number. She'd feel terrible if he showed up at the hotel looking for her when she wasn't there. She could be mean and leave him hanging, but she couldn't, there was already enough bad stuff in her life that she couldn't cause any in someone else's. Sitting on the bed, she picked up the receiver and dialed the number. The phone rang twice before it was picked up.

"Yo!"

"Leon?" Erin asked timidly, afraid she'd dialed the number wrong.

"Yeah, that'd be me. Who's this?"

"It's Erin, you know, the girl that took you to breakfast this morning," she reminded him. She could hear a couple other people in the background and wondered where he was, who he was with, and then frowned as she fought down the pang of jealousy that the thought brought.

"Hold up a sec," he said before his voice became muffled. "Will you guys shut up? I'm on the phone." Erin heard someone mumble something at him before Leon mumbled 'whatever' and the background people seemed to fade away.

"Sorry about that. So what's up?" he asked, his voice sensuous even over the phone.

"About tonight. I can't go." Erin was surprised to hear the regret in her voice.

"Oh…well…" he trailed off, not sure what to say in his disappointment.

"It's not that I don't want to," Erin hurried on. "But I caught up with my uncle, or more he did with me, and now I'm at his house. Some family stuff is going down and I can't go. I really am sorry," she said apologetically.

"It's okay, I understand. You know, family is kind of obligatory. Um…what are you doing this Friday?" His voice was hesitant, almost leery of her turning him down again. Erin felt bad for putting that feeling in his voice, but then her brain started functioning again. _Remember, you don't want anything to do with him? The mistake named Jay ring any bells?_

"I don't know yet," she answered, unsure how to answer him. She didn't want to totally shoot him down but she didn't want him to think she was eager to go out with him either.

"Well, why don't you keep me in mind and I'll call you on Thursday?" Leon's voice was back to its smooth, confident tone.

"Sure," she replied. They exchanged goodbyes and it wasn't until she began walking out towards the kitchen that she realized she'd never given him the number to the house. She paused, thinking of calling him back, but continued on with a shrug; if he really wanted to go out with her he'd find a way to call. She wasn't going to make this easy for him, not when she knew she could be hurt too easily.

Her uncle looked up as she entered the kitchen, Olivia screaming her name beside him.

"ERIN!" she yelled out as she practically bounced in her seat.

"Hey Olive," Erin greeted as she slowly took a seat across the table from her, her delicate movements not going unnoticed by either of the adults.

"I almost thought I imagined you, but I'm really glad you're here," Olivia said eagerly, her pigtails flapping around her face as she talked. Erin gave her a smile and thanked Fiona as she set down a plate of food in front of her.

"How you feeling?" Ray asked, his eyes reflecting the concern he felt.

"I'm sore and hurting, but I'm okay." She glanced down at her plate before looking back up at him. "I just wanted to say thank you too, for letting me stay," she added, Ray's face breaking out in a grim smile.

"You're welcome. Now eat, I'll get you some pain killers." Ray got up and set two pills in her hand seconds later.

"Thanks." Erin took them as Olivia stared at her confused.

"Mommy? Is Erin sick?" she asked, worry marring her face.

"No honey, she's just hurt so Daddy gave her something to feel better," Fiona replied.

"How'd she get hurt?" The three of them glances between each other, trying to figure out how to explain the situation to her.

"She got hurt by a bad man," Ray finally said.

"Is the bad man gone?" Olivia asked, her hands set on her hips.

"He will be soon," Erin answered. Olivia opened her mouth as if to ask another question and Erin held her breath. Finally, Olivia nodded, satisfied with her answer and began eating her dinner.

Dinner was quiet, both Fiona and Ray asking her about school and what she planned to do. She fiddled with her fork as she mumbled out her responses.

"Wait, where's your brother?" Ray asked as Fiona was picking up the dishes.

"He's in Florida as far as I know, he called me on my graduations but that was the last time I heard from him. I don't even have a way to reach him," she answered, feeling tears prickle at the corners of her eyes.

"Don't worry," Ray replied as he rubbed her shoulder, "I'll see what I can find on him tomorrow."

"Thanks."

"All right, that's enough thanks missy. I don't want to hear another one out of your mouth," he teased but Erin knew he was serious. She nodded and took a sip from her water.

"I think I'm going to turn in," she commented as she stood up.

"Oh! Can I sleep with Erin? Please, please, please?" Olivia begged.

"I don't think so baby," Friona said. "Erin needs her rest."

"But Mom," Olivia stared to whine.

"It's fine, she can sleep with me," Erin interrupted and Olivia broke out into squeals. "Why don't you go get into your pajamas and pick out a couple books for me to read you," Erin suggested and Olivia was bouncing out of her seat and racing down the hall.

"You sure you want to deal with that?" Fiona asked with a raised eyebrow and Erin gave a small laugh.

"I think I can manage. Good night."

Fiona and Ray said good night and Erin walked down the hall back into the guestroom. She quickly changed into an oversized shirt and a pair of shorts. She smirked as Olivia came bounding in with her pretty pink princess pajamas and pink bunny slippers on, a couple of book clutched tightly underneath her small arms.

"Don't forget to brush your teeth!" Fiona called from the kitchen.

"Race ya!" Olivia yelled as she dropped the books and dashed out the door. Erin followed after her at a much slower pace, not wanting to push her battered body.

Once the nightly rituals were done, Erin found herself snuggled up in bed, Olivia bunched up at her side, as she read the books to her. Half way through the third book, Erin looked down to see Olivia fast asleep. She carefully put the books on the side table and turned off the side lamp.

It felt nice to let go for a bit, even if it was with a little kid. She smirked and smoothed down he cousin's hair. Olivia was so innocent and fun, it made Erin's troubles feel lighter for a bit. _The same way Leon makes you feel…no he doesn't. Yes he does,_ her heart argued back.

She gave a mental growl of frustration and tired to force her head to shut up to no anvil. The internal argument on went on for a while before Erin finally fell to sleep a few hours later.

* * *

The doorbell, along with pounding on the door, woke her up the next morning. She sat up to find herself alone in the room. A note on the nightstand told her to make herself at home and that there was plenty of food in the fridge. On the bottom Fiona and Ray's cell and work numbers were written.

Erin slowly eased out of bed and walked towards the front door. She checked through the eyehole to see who it was and felt herself begin to hyperventilate, a light sheen of sweat breaking out on her body.

"Erin! Open this goddamn door. I know you're in there!" her father yelled from the other side of the door, his pounding making the door rattle. Rather than say something, she ran to the living room and hid behind one of the couches. The pounding on the living room windows startled her and she curled into a tight ball, ignoring the vulgar words he was yelling.

She slipped into a catatonic state as his words and pounding began to fade. She closed herself in and fell into a dark abyss, where nothing could touch her.

* * *

It was a few hours later, when Ray came home for lunch, that he found Erin curled up behind the couch. He slowly made his way towards her, calling her name softly, and knelt beside her.

"Erin…Erin," he whispered as his hand barely brushed her shoulder. She let out a strangled cry and flew back, hands up to protect her self. Her brown eyes were wild until they focused on Ray and she lowered her hands, wrapping them around her bent knees. Subconsciously rocking herself as she began to talk.

"He was here." There was no question about who 'he' was. Ray looked around the room and then turned back to Erin.

"Did he get in?" Erin shook her head in negative and glanced around to make sure he wasn't there. "Okay, you wait here while I go make a quick sweep of the house, all right?" Erin couldn't do anything but shake her head yes. She more felt than saw Ray leave her side.

Why was she being like this? That last confrontation, she'd been so strong and now here she was, crouching behind a couch like a little lost kitten. Her grandparent's disowning her had broken her more than she'd like to admit. Even though she had Ray now, she was still broken, the parts of her all shattered. This man, her father, had taken everything she held dear and ripped them away. And it wasn't fair but what could she do?

Erin tried to push down the wave of hopelessness that threatened to consume her and if it wasn't for her uncle reappearing at her side, she feared it would have swallowed her. His paternal touch on her arm brought her further out of her shell and she sat, ashamed at how she had behaved. Why did she let her father have such a hold over her? She shook her head to shake the last of her fear off and stared up at Ray, his eyes searching hers.

"I'm okay," she reassured him, slowly getting to her feet and wrapping her arms around herself.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, just shaken. I didn't really expect him to come back so soon. I'm more ashamed of my reaction than anything," she confessed with a blush.

"Erin, it's okay. I promise not to hold it against you," he replied, winking at her, as he wrapped an arm around her. "Why don't you go take a shower and I'll whip something together for lunch?"

"Okay," Erin answered and headed towards the guestroom. After grabbing some clothes she headed towards the bathroom. Once inside the shower, she turned it as hot as she could stand, letting the water soak into her skin and wash away the events of the morning, letting the heat loosen her tightened muscles.

As the water coursed down her face, she let the tears that felt hotter than the water fall, scorching a trail down her cheeks. She chocked back a sob, hitting her fisted hands against the tile wall in an effort to stop her crying. Feeling in control again, she shut off the water and got dressed.

She stood looking at herself in the mirror over the sink. Her hair had grown a bit and now brushed below her shoulders. Her hair, the same color as her fathers'. With reckless abandonment, she opened the drawer searching for a pair of scissors. She found them and began hacking away at her hair. She dropped the hair into the garbage and then looked back into the mirror. She took a deep breath as she swept a hand through her shorn locks.

The cuts were jagged, her hair now only a couple inches long. It was ragged, but she like it, a lot. It was different and exactly what she was looking for, anything to make her feel different. Shaking her head, she let out a giggle, enjoying the weightless feeling her head had now that most of her hair had been cut off. She ran a hand through her hair one more time before leaving the bathroom.

Ray instantly looked up at her as she entered the kitchen, shock apparent on his face.

"Your aunt is so going to kill you," he remarked, laughing a bit.

"Does it look okay?" she asked, self conscious for a moment, her hand flying towards her hair.

"It does. Actually, I think I might like it better than the way you had it before," he said with a smirk.

"Thanks," she replied sarcastically.

"No, I really do like it. It seems to suit you." He came over to her, ruffling her hair and she swatted him away. "Your aunt's still going to kill you," he said over his shoulder as he headed back over to the counter to finish fixing their sandwiches.

"You think?" she asked with a cringe as she sat down on a stool at the counter.

"Well, to say she's going to be shocked might be an understatement," he replied before laughing again. "Oh boy, I can't wait till Olivia sees you and starts begging for hair like yours. Fiona is going to throw a fit."

"You'd let Olivia cut her hair like mine?" she asked surprised.

"Yeah, it's just hair, not like it doesn't grow back, right? Although, I'd be more inclined for her to go get it done somewhere rather than finding a pair of scissors and doing it herself," he jibed at her, handing her a sandwich. She rolled her eyes, feeling much more like herself.

They ate in relative silence, talking when they had something to say, but the silences in between were comfortable.

"Oh Erin, I forgot to tell you, I found some info on your brother this morning," Ray said as he washed up their dishes.

"You did?" she asked excitedly. God, she missed her brother so much and longed to talk to him.

"I, well, I called him this morning and talked to him," he admitted as he sat down next to her and Erin's smile vanished.

"What did he say?" she managed to choke out.

"He wasn't very happy. He's still waiting for you to call and explain everything to him. Said he wants to hear from you, so I told him you'd call him later. Here's the phone number." Ray handed her a piece of paper and Erin clutched onto it. "Feel free to talk to him as long as you need to."

"I will, thank you."

"All right, kiddo, I have to get going. Just be careful the rest of the day and if your dad ends up showing up again, call me, okay?" Erin nodded her head and watched as Ray gathered his jacket again and headed towards the front door. "And remember to call your brother, he's really worried about you."

Erin nodded her head, afraid what would happen if she opened her mouth. She was just a whirl of emotions. Ray left with a wink, tell her to lock the door behind him. As soon as she had done as she had been told, she headed back to the guestroom and sat on the bed, staring at the phone. With shaking hands she picked it up and dialed the number on the piece of paper. She closed her eyes as she waited for someone to pick up, the rings seeming to last an eternity.

"Hello?" An anxious voice answered.

"Hey bro," Erin said quietly.

"Erin, tell me everything, and I mean everything," Kyle ordered.

Erin spent the next hour or so explaining all the events since his departure. "Uncle Ray found me yesterday, and I've been here since," she finished with a loud sigh. Kyle was silent, letting everything sink in.

"Oh god Erin, why didn't you tell me?" Kyle asked, his voice cracking and Erin could hear the tears in his voice, making her own eyes water.

"I didn't want to trouble you, you know me, always worrying about everybody else. Kyle, I didn't know what to do. Jay was there and then…"

"I'll kill that bastard," he growled.

"No Kyle, he's not even worth your time. I was willingly with him, he didn't take advantage of me."

"Still, I'll give him the beating of his life if I see him," he vowed.

"Get in line after me bud, I get first shots at him," she shot back and was relieved to hear Kyle chuckle.

"I'm coming out Erin," he stated once their laughter had quieted.

"No Kyle, I don't want you to drop everything just because of me. It sounded like you were doing good down there," Erin argued.

"And I can do good out in LA too. I already made plans and am packing up my stuff. I already got an apartment set up and a friend of a friend who's going to get all my stuff there, since I can't put everything in my baby."

"Your baby?"

"Yeah. I got me a nice car now. I'd tell you about it but I want it to be a surprise. Erin," he started, growing serious again. "I want you to move in with me."

"Okay," she agreed with a sigh.

"Erin, there are several reasons why I want you to…wait, did you just say okay? That was surprisingly easy," he commented with a laugh.

"Well if you want, I can start arguing," she challenged.

"Oh no, you already agreed, to late to argue now. I just want to make sure you're safe and have you around until everything gets settled. I need to make sure you're okay."

"I know. But I'm not living with you forever!"

"Hey, I think I'm very pleasant to live with," he exclaimed indignantly.

"Sure," she replied sarcastically.

"No, but seriously, it'd only be temporary. After a while, I wouldn't object to you moving out on your own. But let me try to fix my guilt by having you live with me for a while, okay?"

"Kyle, I don't want you to feel guilty. I didn't tell you and that's my fault. How were you supposed to know?" she countered back.

"Doesn't matter. I shouldn't have left you there, I should have found a way to take you, or waited till you could," he answered back with a mix of anger and remorse.

"Kyle, it's done and over with," she declared and then took a breath before continuing on. "I don't want to dwell on it more than I need to. I love you, you're my brother, but you're also your own man and needed to do what you needed to do for yourself, okay? I understand that. I did the best I could on my own and it didn't work out so well, so now we just pick up the pieces and start all over, that's life," she said through her tears that had started to fall halfway through her little speech.

"God, sometime I wonder how old you are, sprouting all this wisdom. Sometimes you sound like…" he trailed off.

"I sound like her sometimes, don't I?" Erin asked, knowing that her brother was talking about their mom.

"Yeah, you do sometimes," he replied with a quiet sniffle. He gave a cough before speaking up again. "We really need to completely talk when I get there, but I should get going so I can finish packing. I'll be there soon, okay?"

"Okay. I'll see you soon then."

"Bye," he said quietly before hanging up. Erin placed down the phone and took another deep breath. _Man, maybe I should invest in taking up yoga or something with all the deep breathing I'm doing_, she thought with a wry smile. She flopped back and thought back over the conversation.

She got a big grin at the fact that her brother was going to be around in a few days. She did feel slightly guilty that he was picking up everything and coming, but her happiness at having him around again won out. His car might be a surprise for her, but her new hair was going to be a shock for him. She briefly wondered what Jay's reaction would have been but quickly dismissed it. Like she had said before, it didn't matter. Jay was done, over with, of the past. Sure, she still had a lot to deal with and events, like the one this morning, threatened to break her, but with Kyle on his way, she found a new resolve. Maybe things could be better. Maybe she just needed to start fresh and start all over, and her hair was just the beginning.

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Oh won't you pretty please review? 


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